Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke to find my boyfriend of 2 years gone. I saw my little sister's talking bear at the bottom of my bed, it said "squeeze me" so I squeezed it and it said "it's over." It was my boyfriends voice. I was dumped by a talking bear. FML
Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML
Today, I had a nervous breakdown. My life has been going down the drain and I called my boyfriend for comfort. I was crying my eyes out, finally getting everything off of my chest that has been bothering me. I thought it was quiet because he was listening closely. I was wrong. He fell asleep. FML
Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized Build-a-Bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear, "We should break up" instead. FML
Today, in an attempt to be romantic, my boyfriend threw little stones against my window. Unfortunately, the window wasn't closed, and I was standing in front of it. FML
Today, I went out shopping. When I left the store, I saw my ex, who I'm still crazy about. He helped me carry my bags out to the car. When I leaned in to give him a hug goodbye, he stepped aside, and I fell face-first into a puddle. He walked away laughing. FML
Today, I had a mental breakdown. Many things have been going completely wrong in my life, and I finally decided to let my boyfriend know about it. After about an hour of explaining and pouring my heart out, his response was, "I think we were better off as friends." FML
Today, I went out and made build-a-bears that looked like my daughter and her new boyfriend. It turns out she had been insisting that I didn't for a good reason; upon sight of his, her boyfriend screamed and fled the house. Turns out he was nearly mauled to death by a bear. FML
Today, I was going through a hard and painful break up after a long relationship. Trying to get over it, I invited my two best friends over to lift my spirits. The night ended with them making out on my bed as I sat alone in the other room. FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Devastated, he withered onto the floor into an inconsolable wreck in front of dozens of people. The ribbon of embarrassment that went down my spine was too much for me to handle, so I had to tell him I was "only joking." FML
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Top comments
plopyer10 8
You shoulve ****** the wind up
tigerbabe15 0
Aww poor teddy bear did he get hurt?
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Comments (265)
plopyer10 8
You shoulve ****** the wind up
indielove 13
The bear was trying to tell you what he would do if he was in your situation.
AaronTkr 0
lol **** mother nature.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Op means oreo ****.
bizarre_ftw 22
Did Oreo **** Really have to come after **** mother nature?! Seriously guys!! You don't even want to Know what kind of images that just sent through my head!!! >.< please!! Someone! Just take away the pain!!!!!!!!!!
zachherbert 10
He had to tell you somehow
jonan1212 5
it's ok, Oreo ****, the teddys head broke it's fall
margie2194 12
God was trying to tell you something babe :(
fatgirllovesfml 0
I think he just got tired of your complaining and decided to suicide! R.I.P Teddy bear:(
abbyelizabeth 9
Oh the irony. Don't sweat your Teddy bear though. Its made of plush so unless some dog got his teeth on it, he's OK.
YourEvilHero 12
no the problem here is she is talking to Teddy bears.
KingDingALing 9
21- Did you figure that out all on your own? You must be proud of yourself.
Jennyboo5797 4
Does this FML remind anyone of that Family Guy episode where she wants her stuffed animals to watch her ballet video and they escape out the window and sunshine bear killed himself :o
beetboxboy 9
yeah^^ true, haha
Bbhd05 0
Never knew that #26
Keyman1212 14
Suicide is not the answer!
cruxx 0
Teddy bear means business.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
I think you dropped your "commit".
sammieboo96 0
suicide is a perminant solution to a temporary problem.
RokNRoll11 9
Take the pain away lime the Teddy bear
Scarshadow101 6
"****** the wind up". Words to live by. OP, I think you know what you gotta do. Just go find yourself a nice, quiet cliff, and let nature's selection do its job.
tigerbabe15 0
Aww poor teddy bear did he get hurt?
rogergraton 0
that comment is way too funny i cant stop laughing.
hellbilly205 17
Lol this fml made me laugh my ass off
somerandomdude19 2
Yep mother nature sure knows how to grind sum gears :p
sydney184829 0
Who cares about the Teddy bear!! Is the balcony ok???
Ilikethenamesam 3
Of course it is
dominictw 3
Its a teddy bear, no it didnt
bitchslapped22 14
The point of the FML isn't that her teddy bear fell, it's that when she asked what she should do the bear 'commited suicide' from the wind
koolkat27 13
148- thank you for clarifying.
ScaughtieHolden 11
Op, I doubt IT "crashed" onto the floor, I bet IT made more of a really quiet thud.
darkmis1 18
He's not hurting anymore...
chickinova 13
it commited scuicide! lol
ImmaB3AST 7
I recently just went through something like that. except I just cried holding my Teddy bear. I'm still recovering and we broke up a month ago. it's tough man.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Of course, seeing as how you have "the most complicated relationship problems right now ".
Madiluvsyuh98 2
Hey river i feel your pain buddy :(
nadhirah 4
They say time will heal all wounds. I'm not too sure if it's true. It's been 4 months and I still feel the pain and sorrow. But the past is the past, it'll be good to let go of it soon to allow our heart to open up to the wider possibilities :) so dear friends, keep persevering. :) it's alright to grief and cry once in a while. But don't let it deprive you from the true meaning of life. Live everyday like it's your last :)
Enslaved 38
I've always heard that it takes half the time you were together to recover from a break up. Ex: 6months if you were in a 12month relationship. Ugh! Sucks doesn't it?
julz0125 5
Sure has been rough recovery for me...however, he moved on before we were actually broken up -_-
Mean_Mr_Mustard 9
That half the time thing isn't true. You will recover whenever your ready regardless of how long you were together. It's alright though, it takes the downs to make the ups that much better. When your up you feel like your on top of the world and when your down it feels like you'll never get back up again. The truth is, you have to find a way to be okay with the downs, they never stop.
tehslack 5
Seriously River, you're 15! You've got your whole life ahead of you.
seanders 10
You're all pathetic.
ryanross 11
I think you guys are forgetting that this is FML, not therapy.
ThreeSheetsGone 12
I usually just go to the bar when I have a bad breakup. Mr Daniels has talked me through a lot of bad times.
queenb1621 21
Mr. Daniels did the same to me too.. Along with my Russian friend Miss Vodka
stargazur 9
My boyfriend broke up with me a month ago, I'm still not over it. We were together for 13 months, the longest relationship I've ever had. He got with another girl in the same hour. I have to sit behind him in one of our classes and the background of his laptop is of him with the other girl.
Mipz 2
Woah, how ironic. It's kinda funny, though.
bizarre_ftw 22
Hence it's presence on FML.........
Mipz 2
Make me feel like a dumbass...
bizarre_ftw 22
I do my best ^_^
kickazz16 15
That's what I call fmll :) fml love lol
ajmacrae 5
How is that ironic?
tellithowitis 13
I farted 00•••••
BCrazzi 9
Heh.. 69 likes...
JediScum 1
I always feel the need to leave the "likes" alone if they rest comfortably at 69 :)
borkchop1992 15
he has the right idea suicide
borkchop1992 15
got moderated after a minute i think thats a record
ImmaB3AST 7
that ***** old at that time I was friends with benefits with like 5 chicks and the only one I wanted to be with was my ex and she liked someone else but we were still friends with benefits. And all the other ones were in love with me but I didn't like them like that.
kingkaid 4
Musta been pretty windy. Where do you live, the top of a mountain?
white16sox 19
I think you missed the word strong but idk
tellithowitis 13
I farted
tellithowitis 13
I tooted.
dreamering 16
Did he breakup?
wordnerd42 0
It's okay 7, I like what you did there. Now that the Teddy bear has broken up, your windowsill will be pouring it's heart out to your lamp, etc. Protect your stuff, it's the only choice!
chick011 0
Rejected from a teddy bear too. Harsh.
helloimjoshlol 0
awww im really sorry : (
sxe_beast 11
Yeah it really sucks that god hates the OP so much that it suggested that the OP should commit suicide.
seeunexttuesdays 6
Stupid Teddy bears not being able to give good advice!
bizarre_ftw 22
It's not that it's incapable of good advice, it's simply a mute that fell out laughing before it could respond
koolkat27 13
I like your picture;)
peacelovepink26 0
haha i know this is not even about the FML but i love spongebob ans thats the cutest picture ive ever seen! :)