Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, after weeks of begging my boyfriend of almost two years to have sex with me, he told me to find someone else to fuck. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Two minutes in, he goes, "Wow, this is strenuous" and stopped. I waited three years for this. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate. It was his first time, which I guess explains him sticking his hand down my panties and practically bitch-slapping my vagina for the next 20 or 30 seconds. I stupidly faked an orgasm just to get him to stop. Now he thinks he's some kind of sex god. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
Today, after trying to convince my girlfriend to have sex for almost 16 months, she finally said yes. I couldn't get it up the second she said it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He tried to put it in unerected. He was serious. FML
Today, I was ready to have sex with my new boyfriend. Turns out he's a 30 year-old virgin who doesn't know shit. He couldn't find my vagina and was just humping my crotch, then when he finally got it in it was 5 pumps, a squirt and done. He thinks he did a good job. Now I have to teach him how to do it properly. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "What do I do now?" FML
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Top comments
redmnky21 8
wow... how old are you... sounds like your way to young for sex
mookie24 2
How old is this guy? You shouldn't have to persuade anybody to have sex
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Comments (290)
gothfreak 0
Holly wow lol hopefully he dont know how lol viragra anybody hahahahahaha wow and for the girl whatdid u guy do gust strip jump and spread what happen to for play ?
monkosis71 6
agreed and very well put, im definitely siding with you on this one
Rasetsu 10
Pressuring your boyfriend to have sex is not okay. And it sounds like you're both way too young to have sex anyways. Enjoy adolescence and a boyfriend who is more interested in emotional connection than physical.
sparkrok 8
murdersquirrel: I completely agree with you. And, I applaud your ability to make not just one, but many valid arguments. Not something we see here on FML all the time. Good job. Keep it coming.
badam_fml 6
How is this even posible
MedKits 9
I love how only women are the ones agreeing with the statement "not every guy is sex crazed". How exactly would you people know?
False_Stupidity 42
Definitely gay or some other serious problem with him
williamcarter93 13
Coaxing...after a year....you've been together 18 months...goddamn, you got ready for sex quick!
williamcarter93 13
hey, everyone isn't all about sex sex sex....just because they didn't **** sometime during 18 months, don't make him gay. Maybe it means that he wants to make sure of who he's with before he starts ******* like a wild raccoon.
fparekkadan 0
I thought that's what you're supposed to do???