Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was ready to have sex with my new boyfriend. Turns out he's a 30 year-old virgin who doesn't know shit. He couldn't find my vagina and was just humping my crotch, then when he finally got it in it was 5 pumps, a squirt and done. He thinks he did a good job. Now I have to teach him how to do it properly. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex. Foreplay was amazing, but as soon as he started to get it in, he lost his erection because he was too nervous. He's a 30-year-old virgin and this has happened at least 10 times. FML
Today, I was messing with my boyfriend in my basement. We are both virgins and he wanted to perform oral sex on me for the first time. Naked, we finally decided to try to have sex. We discovered the act is much harder than it may seem. We're both still virgins. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, after a year of coaxing, I got my boyfriend of 18 months to agree to have sex with me. He decided his first course of action was to try to shove his flaccid penis into my unlubricated vagina. FML
Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I tried to have sex for the first time. Everything was going well, until he tried to put it in. A few minutes later, he said, "It's not hard enough." We tried for another half hour to fix that. We ended up eating ice cream. FML
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
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Top comments
epoh_fml 0
aw it sucks but you're doing him a great deed. My brother is a 31 year old virgin (I am 85% sure of this). SOMEONE has to help those poor guys out!
jf7609 0
which hole? this guy hasn't seen any ****?
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Comments (147)
blingblingbling 0
haha, get rid of him ASAP
marine10_fml 0
ten more years and you have da dada daaaa. 40 year old virgin!
yourefreakindumb 0
10 years would be 44 year old virgin. Dumb ass!
loveconverse 0
rotflmao
Bertha5 0
aaahhhaa! faiill.
strawberryhtty 0
haha love the re re's who can't add
austinryansmith 0
that's what I'm saying
bonnieandclyde44 0
hahhaha
ydi_ruuc 0
YDI for not putting it on for him bitch, now make his sammich
fearlesstiger98 0
not funny 108.
luis420 0
fyl
hunterluv1 20
why? I think it's good that he has some morals... at least he's not a man ****
hunterluv1 20
why? I think it's good that he has some morals... at least he's not a man ****
hyefedyee 0
wow 30 years old n still virgin
goadpercussion 0
he will get the hang of it.
hyefedyee 0
sorry I ment 34 n that's worse
saucey12 1
lmfao
epoh_fml 0
aw it sucks but you're doing him a great deed. My brother is a 31 year old virgin (I am 85% sure of this). SOMEONE has to help those poor guys out!
fsu69 0
if i was 31 and a virgin id git a hooket
xlostwithoutu 0
Wow.... just wow.... this is like the funniest FML ever....Fail XD
michelknewt 0
picture win :D
shibainu519 0
go Shane!
_MissBliss_ 0
Well, stop it.
jf7609 0
which hole? this guy hasn't seen any ****?
perdix 31
Apparently, he has. Those **** chicks take it up the ass just as easily as they take it in the pussy. Some of the clips feature more anal. And let's not get started with double penetration! I think the guy is a fine gentleman for offering his girlfriend the option.
sweatnut 0
gold as usual perdix :)
fmller12 0
yeah, I bet he has watched too much **** and got a stage fright when it came to a real thing
DaKillahMan 0
Perdix, you sir are brilliant!
Giants24 0
thats what i said
Rowdey 10
I think you mean "Taupe as usual Perdix."
ManiacGoblin46 12
I was thinking the same thing 23. Some guys would dive into where ever they want. I think she should be glad he asked.
jesushenchman 0
ha
supmofukka 0
the virgin thing is kind of shockin but how does he not kno where to put it?? what are his eyes virgins too?? no **** either????