Today, after a stressful week, I spent my last few dollars on some comfort food. Later, my roommate's girlfriend came over and helped herself to my juice, drinking it straight from the bottle. I'm such a germaphobe, I can't bring myself to even take a sip. It's a full bottle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Today, I opened my fridge. It's entire contents: half a takeaway meal and 4 bottles of wine. FML
Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML
Today, someone drank a sip of my single serve pasteurized orange juice and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the whole jug of non-pasteurized juice, that I cant drink because im pregnant. I cried. FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, so I made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informed me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Today, after having a hard week, I decided to order a pizza with an expensive milkshake. It slipped out of my hand in front of the lift. It went everywhere. I had nothing on me to clean it up with. Now I’m milkshakeless, down £5, and accidentally responsible for littering my accommodation. FML
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
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Top comments
SpankyMcThrust 6
I ******* hate it when people drink from the container; I don't give a **** about germs, learn some goddamn manners! Especially if you don't live there/aren't family.
thehoneybadger 10
Just poke a hole in the side of the bottle and drain it out into a bowl or something. It won't have to go past the Infected Area of the bottle.
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Comments (301)
mintcar 10
Did she know it was your juice? She probably assumed it was her boyfriends. In any case, it's still pretty gross. I would just buy some more juice. Imagine all the backwash OP.
cynide 13
no offense, but get over it and just drink it!
bannedforlife 0
Backwash is disgusting. Don't drink the juice even if you do grow a pair.
zombiekitten87 12
that's disgusting
JenL_fml 7
Why the heck is your roommate's girlfriend helping herself to YOUR juice? Make them buy it back! That crap is straight up nasty, drinking from the container when others have to drink from it! Ugh.
knocking 0
I'm just curious. What comfort food comes in the form of a juice? Anyway, I feel your pain OP. I'm not a germaphobe, but I absolutely hate it when people drink out of my personal containers. Like numerous other people have said, make your roommate or the girlfriend buy you a new bottle. And now might be a good time to lay down some house rules, such as don't eat/drink things that don't belong to you (or your significant other, with the girlfriend actually being the guilty one in this situation) without that person's permission. I'm sure you can come up with more. Finally, what kind of person goes into another persons house and drinks straight out of tje container? When her birthday comes around buy her a book on manners. And maybe mark the pages she needs to pay special attention to.
Cynical_in_SK 6
I think the FML in this case was that the op spent the last of his money on comfort food and didn't have the money to replace the juice.
Cynical_in_SK 6
Sorry...her money. OP is a girl.
biasedshooter 24
op is a guy! blue is guy pink is girl!
theybebitchin 4
Actually, OP is a guy. Read the FML.
Cynical_in_SK 6
Lol...oh yeah. Sorry...must be sniffing too much glue! I need an intervention. lol
jose18 3
u people are stupid u can't just get over a phobia stop leaving dumbass comments telling her to get over her fear of germs
JenL_fml 7
Um... OP's a guy.
LinTurk 4
Damn. I'm meant to thumb you up. Sorry. It seems a lot of people seem to think it's a girl, but the username is Adam something and there's the male symbol next to it. IDK.
scottyrocks123 21
I hate fuckheads like that
BaconDave 12
You would've gotten his spit anyway
Azrael9 11
she should have asked first to make sure that it was her bf's and not yours. quite ignorant on her part.
SteelCladAngel 0
ugh, I don't have a germnphobia but I will //not// drink after someone I'm close to and //rarely// drink after people I am close with. I'd make the trashy bitch buy a new bottle of juice
SteelCladAngel 0
not drink after someone I'm //not// close to**