Today, after a stressful week, I spent my last few dollars on some comfort food. Later, my roommate's girlfriend came over and helped herself to my juice, drinking it straight from the bottle. I'm such a germaphobe, I can't bring myself to even take a sip. It's a full bottle. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent hours cleaning the kitchen that my slob roommates always neglect. I scrubbed the floor, emptied the fridge, washed all the dishes, etc. When I was done, I was thirsty so I got myself a soda. I opened the can, and it exploded and sprayed everything I had just washed. FML
Today, I opened my fridge. It's entire contents: half a takeaway meal and 4 bottles of wine. FML
Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML
Today, someone drank a sip of my single serve pasteurized orange juice and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the whole jug of non-pasteurized juice, that I cant drink because im pregnant. I cried. FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, so I made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informed me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
Today, after having a hard week, I decided to order a pizza with an expensive milkshake. It slipped out of my hand in front of the lift. It went everywhere. I had nothing on me to clean it up with. Now I’m milkshakeless, down £5, and accidentally responsible for littering my accommodation. FML
Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML
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Top comments
SpankyMcThrust 6
I ******* hate it when people drink from the container; I don't give a **** about germs, learn some goddamn manners! Especially if you don't live there/aren't family.
thehoneybadger 10
Just poke a hole in the side of the bottle and drain it out into a bowl or something. It won't have to go past the Infected Area of the bottle.
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Comments (301)
SuckItTrolls 7
Stop being a germ freak and ******* drink the damn thing. Its not ganna kill you or some shit.
perdix 31
I have a deep-seated aversion to wasting food. Send me the juice and I'll drink it. (I don't really like juice -- I just really, really hate wasting food.) Make my psychological problem the solution to yours.
TheNewGuy03 29
DOOD! yeah, seriously, i hate, hate, HATE when people throw out shit. it literally makes me sick. i have to tell them to think of the starving kids. THINK OF THE KIDS, DAMMIT. >< i find it funny that people like to french kiss and suck dick and eat pussy and all that, but the moment their lips touch your container of holy ******* juice, then it's motherfucking world war iii. society, do us a favor and stop being a pansy!
geeksaresexy 18
It's one thing for your partner to drink out of the bottle, it's quite another for your housemates girlfriend to do it... For all he knows she might be a total ***** riddled with disease!
TheNewGuy03 29
213 -- yeah, i agree with that. no stranger should be drinking out of someone else's bottle. but i was speaking about many people who are just afraid of touching or eating something simply because it has been in contact with another human, despite doing other things that bring them into contact with many other (potentially more harmful) pathogens.
redmnky21 8
use a clorox wipe then wash it off with a wet cloth with water... or get over it and realize bacteria and germs cover EVERYTHING!!! its why we have immune systems
aramross91 7
we have multiple??? I could've sworn it was "an immune system".
ethang1996 0
BOO HOO ;,(. it's only juice. what are you 5?!
shelby0123 0
#3 that's a good idea and all but there is still back wash
izzy7 11
Have you never kissed anyone? Same thing.
Tolerate 4
no wonder you're stressed LOL
Tolerate 4
oh btw that sounds like a fairly annoying phobia. you should go get counseling for it.
iCHEA3RY 0
I wouldn't drink it either, I wouldn't mind if it was family or even close friends but otherwise that's just nasty.
lilykat84 4
haha well, next time she comes over, rub some super strength oral-gel on the rim of whatever she usually drinks . :) it'll numb her mouth and maybe she'll leave your drinks alone. :P
slieb845 0
the most pointless phobia. germs are on everything. and if you spend life avoiding germs you wont build up your immune system. and then you die from a germ