Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, when I was at the gynecologist my dr told me that I was really tense and the exam would be impossible if I didnt relax. So I started thinking about my boyfriend to relax and my mind went back to our last sex session. I started getting wet. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML
Today, I realized I'm extremely sexually attracted to my physical therapist. It doesn't help that treatment involves me spending the entire appointment naked from the waist down. FML
Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML
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Top comments
drawmesunshine 17
"I want to lick your labia minora." That's not so bad, OP.
DocBastard 40
There's no need for you to use your hypoglossal nerve in lingually palpating her ********. If she digitally stimulates your frenulum of prepuce, you're going to get into trouble. Just ignore her nipple-areola complex and concentrate on your textbook, junior.
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Comments (128)
Awsumuzzie 12
"Anatomical names for what I was touching and 'DOING'?" doing? as in: "softly thrusting" or " inserting slowly"? What are anatomical names for doing things?
Awsumuzzie 12
Jk, -itis. Move along.
MyGrlzFly 4
I have wondered before how an OB/GYN doctor deals with that after a long days work. Ok, why is that something I have thought about?!?!?!?
biggestfan23 11
Feel sorry for you OP that's unfortunate but keep going at it with her and all your pains will go away
RedPillSucks 33
Were's DocBastard?
miz_kamakazi 11
That's exactly who I was looking for!
DocBastard 40
I'm at work, damn it. :)
The_Troller 14
So, Doc, have you ever had the same problem as OP?
DocBastard 40
No. Never. I learned quickly to separate work with home.
florido_fml 10
Quit or stfu ayyyyy
22jrdn55 15
oh i know how that feels, and it doesn't only happen during sex! :'(
dhardesty23 8
doesn't matter. had sex.
naddification 7
Oh, doctors have sex too! :D
DocBastard 40
Yes, we have sex constantly. Ever seen those "naughty nurse" **** videos? They are surprisingly accurate. Janitor closets, elevators, patient rooms...anywhere, everywhere, all the time.
Awsumuzzie 12
47, I'm not sure whether to be excited or cautious... I'm a HUC, so I'm always there.
Akharr01 5
I wonder how the girl felt when you touched her and your face turned green??
Clamcreepy 7
You better toughing up like Docbastard which I'm sure he'll common on this post soon
Clamcreepy 7
Comment*
stephanieeDawnx 0
He already has. :D