Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I was at the gynecologist my dr told me that I was really tense and the exam would be impossible if I didnt relax. So I started thinking about my boyfriend to relax and my mind went back to our last sex session. I started getting wet. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML
Today, I realized I'm extremely sexually attracted to my physical therapist. It doesn't help that treatment involves me spending the entire appointment naked from the waist down. FML
Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
drawmesunshine 17
"I want to lick your labia minora." That's not so bad, OP.
DocBastard 40
There's no need for you to use your hypoglossal nerve in lingually palpating her ********. If she digitally stimulates your frenulum of prepuce, you're going to get into trouble. Just ignore her nipple-areola complex and concentrate on your textbook, junior.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (128)
nvo 6
Sleep, then try again in the morning, when your mind has gotten home as well.
MandieL 27
Why do so many comments have so many thumbs down? It's not like these comments were bad.
Goddamnidiots 12
This just proves that all good jobs have down sides too.
SPAIDZ 0
Kinky
raspberryboo 10
now i know for sure i'll never become a doctor lol
brunetteblonde07 7
This cracked me up LMAO dude that really sucks!
Gilliam999 0
after chemistry all I can think about is the molecular structure of objects
dannypete 3
Doesn't matter had sex.
Denny1 15
This should b in a doctor show or something it would make a funny scene.
amcwilliams94 4
I know how you feel...