Today, after a hard day on the wards as a trainee doctor, I went home and started getting frisky with my girlfriend. All I could think about was the anatomical names for what I was touching and doing. I felt physically sick. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, when I was at the gynecologist my dr told me that I was really tense and the exam would be impossible if I didnt relax. So I started thinking about my boyfriend to relax and my mind went back to our last sex session. I started getting wet. FML
Today, after years of faking pleasure with my boyfriend, I visited the gynaecologist. As soon as she touched my privates I instinctively let out a fake moan. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were both at home, sick. We decided to make the best of it and spent the day in bed together. Things got a little steamy, and we started making out. As I started kissing her neck, I got nauseous. Before I could pull away, I threw up all over her. FML
Today, I had to go to the hospital. While I was there, my mom started hitting on a doctor. Later I saw them making out in the room next to me. FML
Today, I went to the physician to check my rear because it was hurting. My usual doctor wasn't available, so he was replaced by a gorgeous woman with big cleavage. when she asked me to pull down my pants, she saw that I had a huge hard on. FML
Today, I realized I'm extremely sexually attracted to my physical therapist. It doesn't help that treatment involves me spending the entire appointment naked from the waist down. FML
Today, I realized how much I hate my girlfriend, when I got excited as the doctor told me I should refrain from having sex for the next two months. FML
Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were getting heated. I kissed her on the neck, chest, stomach, and threw up as I kissed between her legs. FML
Today, I was lucky to have an extremely attractive doctor operating on me. This would have been great had he not been removing a foreign object from my vagina after an ill-fated masturbation session. FML
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Top comments
drawmesunshine 17
"I want to lick your labia minora." That's not so bad, OP.
DocBastard 40
There's no need for you to use your hypoglossal nerve in lingually palpating her ********. If she digitally stimulates your frenulum of prepuce, you're going to get into trouble. Just ignore her nipple-areola complex and concentrate on your textbook, junior.
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Comments (128)
magicgal86 1
Haha ... I totally understand. I remember learning about the Cremasteric reflex and just doing that over and over and over and laughing as it was entertaining and exciting to actually see it happen.
neander 8
Anatomically correct sex, awesome!
amypatel21 2
That's sad.
anniemeece 23
Nothing sexier than coitus. ;)
vitty_z 16
it's a slowpoke.. get it? haha
SauceySarah 30
I don't try to show off. Who do you think you are acting like you know me? I just like using big words. Unlike you..
SauceySarah 30
Yeah this was a reply to a comment. Uhh.. Lol oops.
Awsumuzzie 12
"Acting like I know you"? I'm either a stalker or an aspiring actress.
SpRiTzSpLaSh 7
Haha, must have been so pleasurable.
friedbunnies 9
Lol this happens to me and I'm not even a doctor. Just a nurse.
neongurl98 10
Well that's kind if a good way to memorize your studies I guess?
tuon 1
That's awesome, pretty sure an intelligent person is much more attractive. I'd be fascinated haha