Anonymous
Canada
Today, a wild squirrel managed to get into my house. I can't see him… but I can hear him in the walls. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
notmyrealname123
This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff
Kitchener, Canada
It's alive!
Today, I found my cat downstairs with a squirrel dangling from his mouth. When I saw this, I yelled at my cat to put it down. He did. Turns out the squirrel was still alive and run. I had to spend the next three hours chasing it out of my house. FML
susiedoggles
Milford, United States
Big man
Today, getting home after a long day of work, my boyfriend came running out of the house. Being silly, I thought he was excited to see me. Nope - he was excited to show me the squirrel he shot. In the house. Apparently, we have house squirrels and a boatload of holes in the floor and couch. FML
upset
Crowded house
Today I opened the door for my cat and he brought in a rat with him. Now the rat is hiding in my house. FML
RaccoonFever
La Jolla, United States
Today, I'm trapped in my apartment, due to the fact that five raccoons have decided to sit outside my only door and prevent me from getting out. Every time I look at one, they hiss at me. FML
Anonymous
Indianapolis, United States
Gross
Today, a bird got into the walls of my house through a hole. I located where it was by following the chirping and scratching sounds, and drilled a hole to get it out. I pulled out the drill, only to find the drill bit bloody. Suddenly, no more chirps. FML
Anonymous
Ratatouille
Today, after my house almost got broken into last week, when I heard some noises in the kitchen I went to investigate. I saw a huge rat run across my floor, and nearly peed myself thinking it was an intruder. FML
rattness
United States
Today, I found out the animal that was gnawing behind the kitchen wall all night was indeed a wild rat and his entire family. FML
hearing too much
This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff
The sound of silence
Today, the walls in my house are so thin that I heard my roommate yell from the bathroom upstairs, "Hear my butthole roar." Now I’m scared to use the bathroom after him. FML
ghoul
Today, I found a dead squirrel under my son's bed. Apparently, he has been keeping it there as a "pet" for the past week. FML
Sarah1330
United States
Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML
Top comments
JackDark 0
He comes in the night, and he brings nuts...
pandorasnymph 0
scary
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Comments (217)
pandorasnymph 0
scary
Diannaa 0
I know right? Picture hearing that all night..
mikeyceroooo 0
this is funny scary shit!
Ep1cPha1l 0
stuff food into the wall so te squirrel will get too fat to run around in ur walls
honestlove11 0
haha :)
tab13 0
If you hear a rattle you'll know it's a male
keenan61194 4
hahahaha, I'm sorry but that's just hilarious.
asianwolf 2
lol but how do you know it's a squirrel. you can only hear it. maybe it's worse.
reyemrein 0
Don't worry it will die eventually. But then it will start to smell...
vrock 0
ok, who said ydi and why? the op totally does not deserve this
demon1k 0
So you posted it on FML... instead of calling pest/animal control. YDI
SmellDaPurp 0
#49
FYLDeep 26
Well if a squirrel can manage to make it inside your wall you probably have a bunch of insects and other stuff inside there too.
DemonChicken 0
rofl I wish I had a pet wall squirrel:)
FYLDeep 26
That squirrel's a stud
JojoBrown520 0
lol @12 "Picture HEARING that..." lolwut?!
theian01 3
But your tame squirrel is fine right?
onepost_n_done 0
Agreed, squirrels are awesome. Not an FML, the true FML is for everyone else and is: Today, I didn't have a wild squirrel come into my house. FML
Diannaa 0
Well I meant can you picture yourself in bed late at night hearing little scratching sounds while you're trying to sleep, but yea I could have worded it better lol.
Metzler31 17
as opposed to a tame squirrel?
GeoThermalSleuth 0
Maybe it's Conker, The alchoholic Squirel, who will destroy you and others in your sleep. Conkers Bad Fur Day FTW! But anyway, you can't even let a poor homeless (possibly alchoholic) squirel live in your Walls? He's homeless, let him live with you. And enjoy your new roomate OP. :D
llcooljoey 0
he's everywhere and yet, nowhere in fact he's watching right now, probably with his little squirrel axe.
baby_val 0
ahh I would cry
epicfailburger 0
today I got into someones house. I'm stuck in the walls and I hear these constant man-squeels
Monikabug 9
#151 ftw. :) FYL for having a hyperactive rodent in your walls ... BUT call animal control OP. Because if you don't? YDI.
luntz66 0
happen to my friend, we flipped over furniture in his house for like four hours till we caught it, turns out when poked a angry squirles growls like it's possesed by the devil and tries to eat your face, it allso climbs on celings (upsidedown) and likes to scare the shit out of you bye falling/jumping/running at you, great memories though. invite some friends over and make it a little hunting party :D
kinukle 0
don't worry, it will just eat u in ur sleep, spit u up, and then eat u again. have fun catching it :)
LemonMan 0
That's nucking futs!
mfmylifesrsly 30
lol I took a fb quiz yesterday on 'how much do you know ab squirrels' DID YOU KNOW THEY HAVE BLACK SQUIRRELS?!?!?!
LemonMan 0
!!!!
Zills 0
A hammer to break a hole on your wall:60$ Peanuts to bait the pesty fuckerwho lives in your wall:2$ A nailgun:400$ Drywall kit:50$ The joy you get when Conker is stuck to your wall in a gooey mess: priceless.
Alek07 0
haha
Betz 10
is it driving you nuts?
Night22_fml 4
the turd monster >.>
Secret_Fire_King 0
Shouldn't this be on MLIA?.. And you haven't seen that it is an actual squirrel, have you, OP? It could be a chipmunk or a raccoon or a ghost or a kid playing a prank.. You know, when you ASSUME, you make an ASS out of U and ME..
icifresh911 0
Lmao at 179
YANKSFAN4EVER 0
Oh man imagine in the middle of the night hearing that I would be ******** myself!!
babalooisbabaloo 5
Yeah because having the corpse of a dead overweight squirrel in your walls will be awesome as well
sum1savemeh 0
wow
ladiesman14 0
its his world hes just trying to get a nut so move your butt.
Elizabeth123654 0
OMFG RUN!!!!
EmperorPsycho 0
this always happens to me. Ok 3 times means always.
TehFuzzyOne 0
You're not the FIRST that's happened to.
SeasonedSausage 0
More like, your not the THIRD thats happened to?
vtranchitella14 3
yeah it happened to me. damn squirrel
Cristaderzi 0
Ya'all need to call that guy that has his show on A
shakenbake93 0
this happened to us once. my dad stabbed it with a butter knife. seriously...
amdspenc 0
Been there! Ours dug a tunnel under our porch and came up through the walls that way. It also ran around in our drop ceiling. We found the entrance to the tunnel, and set a live trap with some peanut butter right outside. He was waiting for us the next morning. Just don't eat it. I've heard they are high in cholesterol.
JackDark 0
He comes in the night, and he brings nuts...
BrownSugar_fml 5
and stuffs them in your mouth
thatonekid2010 0
i like eggs
nomnommonster 0
well, he will soon die, then you'll have a Quietly rotting body in your walls. ta-dah! it's like magic
flashback.miss 28
feel the squirelly wrath!!!!!!! he wanted to show his nuts are bigger than mountains, Im afraid. youll feel that when he comes a planting seeds when youre asleep... lol
iSitt 0
a neighborhood squirrel yells at me from it's tree everytime I walk by.
ncurtsak 0
what's the big deal?^^
daydreamstar 7
you live next to a a bald girl with THOUGHTS and a talking, though normally mouthless squirrel?? Oo
WordsOfHope 0
wow...
garuru 4
lure him out with nuts then shoot him with a crossbow
ChrisCTL 0
Kenny?
willou35_fml 13
lol :-)
tomahawkinyouall 0
who cares? how is this a FML? just hire an exterminator and you'll be fine, geez... lol
heyheyt 0
an exterminator for squirrels? they have those?
eeeeeeee 5
Sure, not an FML if you like getting your house ravaged by a wild animal. Stupid.
Diannaa 0
There's always animal controll..
coldblood 4
i have 50 cal BBs and a slingshot no need for animal control my friend.
pozmc 0
cool
a7xlive90 0
that