Today, a funny smelling liquid was sprayed all over the computer. Last week, I told my fully pottytrained but extremely reluctant toddler that he couldn't play Barney games until he used the big boy toilet. A 4 year old's revenge really sucks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML
Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML
Today, I spent two hours convincing my 3-year-old son that he can't poop on his 4-month-old brother out of retaliation for the baby pooping on him. He did it anyway. FML
Today, my toddler peed in his potty for the first time. He was so excited to show me that he flung the pot in the air dousing my face with his piss. Then he laughed. FML
Today, I caught my 4 year old son yet again trying to drink out of the toilet. FML
Today, the 3-year-old I nanny wanted to prove to me that he was tall enough to pee standing up in front of the toilet. When he realized he actually was tall enough, he got excited and misdirected his stream, covering himself, his brother, and me in urine. FML
Today, I had to tell my 4 year-old, "I'm wiping my butt right now, I can't get you a drink. Please wait a minute." I distinctly heard my neighbor laughing through the bathroom window. FML
Today, I had to tell McDonald's that my 11-year-old son thought it would be funny to take a dump in the urinal. I then had to clean it up. FML
Today, my two year-old is being potty trained. He got the gist of it and actually did #1 and #2 in the potty and after our little celebratory dance, I went to get him a cookie (which took me two seconds). I come back to see him covered in shit and pee because he tried to go empty the potty himself. FML
Today, I was under the impression that my kids would eventually grow out of wanting to watch me use the bathroom. Instead, my 7 year-old son attempted to pick the lock so he could watch me take a shit and make fun of me for it. FML
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Top comments
Dopeyrox 0
your kid sounds like a brat
xenomorph 0
1. Find a way to neutralize the smell, perhaps vinegar. 2. Apply the substance to the computer, then dry off. 3. ???? 4. PROFIT!!!!!!!
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Comments (103)
DzCountingSheep 0
I agree with aback. Who waits until their child is old enough for preschool to potty train them?
RuralNinja 0
YDI for waiting so long to potty train him, and for being such a lax parent that he knows he will get away with it. Learn to discipline your kids, and they won't grow up like that.
Lehk 9
so take away his barney game forever
Punkartmama 0
Guess he isn't fully potty trained. FYI - don't try to blackmail kids, they are getting too smart for that.
l33tm0nk3y 0
So...the good news is, he knows how to control (or at the very least recognize the onset of) his bodily functions?
akayou 0
why isn't he potty trained properly at the age of Phucking 4
Phoenix_GAD 0
YOU are the "phucking" idiot. learn to read before insulting people, moron.
fafa123_fml 0
he is , as was mentioned in the fml dummy :P
jillz 0
He chose your computer as the target. Sounds like mommy uses the computer too much and he feels like your eyes spend more time being glued to a screen than focusing on him.
cooperisacat 0
Um, is a 4 year old really a toddler?
TheLoneWolf87 4
No, but how does he not know how to go to the bathroom? Me and my siblings learned when we were 2. Tell him you'll go commando and slit Barney's throat if he doesn't learn to use the can.