Today, I was in the car with my daughter when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML
Today, I was arguing in the car with my boyfriend about who was the better driver. Being so incensed by the fact that he thought he was better made me completely zone out, and run a red light. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, while driving to work in heavy traffic, I got so into the song I was listening to that I tapped my foot on the gas to the beat. I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML
Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML
Today, while driving my car, there was a talk on the radio about road safety. I got so engrossed that I drifted and crashed my car into a sign promoting the talk. FML
Today, I took my 15 year-old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML
Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML
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Top comments
BigBoyBounce 5
Not only did you almost endanger your daughter, you almost endangered other drivers. People like you don't deserve to have your license.
Mademoiselle_fml 34
I don't blame you. David Bowie's one sexy beast ;)
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Comments (186)
white16sox 19
18, stop sign*
white16sox 19
32, a lot of people post on here knowing they'll get more YDI's than FYL's.
SarahAlleen 8
As a fellow horrid driver, this made me giggle. Hard core.
Trisha_aus 15
Enough with the peets boy love agree the bloke is cute but chill there are better looking men!
Trisha_aus 15
Haha Noor made a joke ok...truth is Megan is plastic now..mila kunis on the other hand is a beauty!
Vanilla1Thrilla 0
Couldn't you hear your brake pedal screaming, "Pressure! Pushing down on me... People on the streets!"
DeannaDLH 3
It's the terror of knowing what this world is about. I bet his daughter was screaming "Let me out!" :C
wellwhatdafk30 0
fyl that you feel you have to answer to your daughter. I fear this planets future
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
My emjois won't show up ;(
perdix 31
Aaaaaaaawww, wham, bam, thank you, ma'am!
bizarre_ftw 22
My thumb up times a couple billion, my favorite comment in the History of FML, I offer you my future first born and bow to your greatness
perdix 31
Why, thank you. I'm blushing :)
hateevryone 15
Daydreaming about sex....admit it.
rebelwithmouseyhair 18
with DAVID BOWIE admit it!