Today, I was in the car with my daughter when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML
Today, I was arguing in the car with my boyfriend about who was the better driver. Being so incensed by the fact that he thought he was better made me completely zone out, and run a red light. FML
Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear-ending the person in front of me. FML
Today, while driving to work in heavy traffic, I got so into the song I was listening to that I tapped my foot on the gas to the beat. I rear-ended the car in front of me. FML
Today, I got into a car accident. Why? I was distracted by a floating spec of dust and was pretending I was in space. FML
Today, my mom was driving with my brothers and sister in the back seat. She was turned around talking to us, when my sister told my mom that she missed the light. She ran it, then screamed at us about not paying attention and noticing your surroundings. FML
Today, while driving my car, there was a talk on the radio about road safety. I got so engrossed that I drifted and crashed my car into a sign promoting the talk. FML
Today, I took my 15 year-old daughter driving. I yelled at her for not going safely around corners. On the way home, while demonstrating how to drive right, I went around a corner and hit a cement truck. FML
Today, I was T-boned at an intersection. My wife got pissed when I didn't immediately check on her, but rather the other driver. That other driver was my daughter. FML
Today, I was singing while driving through the car park. I blacked out trying to hit a high note, and ended up bashing into another car. FML
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Top comments
BigBoyBounce 5
Not only did you almost endanger your daughter, you almost endangered other drivers. People like you don't deserve to have your license.
Mademoiselle_fml 34
I don't blame you. David Bowie's one sexy beast ;)
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Comments (186)
Suba_fml 8
David Bowie is my hero d d David David Bowie
interzone_fml 2
I don't think anyone can blame you, Bowie is beyond fantastic
kaitie311 1
This could be an FYL and YDI. I don't blame you, David Bowie is one sexy man!;) I dont drive yet, but if I were I probably would watch where I'm driving to be on the safe side. It sucks that your daughter doesn't know the meaning of someone else's privacy.
LovexInfinity 5
Anyone else notice it's a man, not a woman?
melikesfml 11
Finally, someone tried to put her in her place.
bizarre_ftw 22
Don't be too eager to meet the starman waiting in the sky
bizarre_ftw 22
107 - I like how you can denounce david bowie but can't recognize references to his music, insulting an artist before even giving them a chance is a bitch move stfu
ClosetTroll 10
'Today I was in the car with Dad when he nearly got us killed. As if that wasn't enough, he admitted to daydreaming about David Bowie as the reason for losing control. FML.'
bizarre_ftw 22
I like how opinions are being put on trial here for one, for two why does physical beauty have to matter this much? And thirdly, noor's comments are the best, they always spark interesting debates and she never bitches out the dumbasses that try and rile her up, a rarity on here - in other words, I applaud the mature commenters and pity the half brained idiots
bizarre_ftw 22
Lets settle this right here, right now: did you laugh? Then your point is otiose.