Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML
Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
Today, I thought I could stay on the phone and go to the bathroom without him noticing. My mom knocks on the door and without even thinking, I yelled "I'M ON THE TOILET!" He said "ew.." FML
Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML
Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML
Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML
Today, I anxiously waited 8 hours for an important phone call. The phone rang while I was sitting on the toilet. FML
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML
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Top comments
jkozzy 8
If his boss ever calls, say the same thing. ;)
Welshite 40
If you are a regular here, you ought to know better. I thought it was standard for FMLers everywhere to take their phones with them into the bathroom.
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Comments (120)
XxskyelovexX 13
I hope she is like me and would just laugh and forget about it. Best of luck op
PYLrulz 17
Trolldad strikes again!
lauraann 0
Wow.. Really? Thanks dad! :(
bach2121 13
Everybody poops!
Skeptical321 0
That stinks OP, hope she laughs it off and talks to you tomorrow!
frigofjim 5
Just play it cool my friend... Just play it cool
AznSamoan52 10
Dads, you gotta love 'em.
ncfbro 3
I don't get why people would think that you deserve it...
alwayswinning123 7
That's bullshit!!!
JOEGERNAUTT 1
You could play it off cool and tell her he's a fool and is always playing around like that. You were actually outside doing... (insert lie here)