number2
United States
Today, while sitting on the toilet, my phone pocket dialed my boss's cell. He was in the next stall. He answered. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
anon
United States
Are you OK?
Today, my phone rang during a meeting. I quickly silenced it, and put it in my pocket. A few minutes later, my boss’s phone rang. It was me, butt-dialing him while we were sitting in the same room. He answered and asked if I had something urgent to discuss. I did not. FML
BigMouth McRedface
United States
Emergency
Today, I was rushing to leave work and get home because I really had to use the bathroom. My phone rang and I thought it was my husband, so I answered by saying, "I really have to poop." Yep, not my husband. It was one of my employees, who has the same name. FML
Lukey1028
San Francisco, United States
Today, my co-worker handed me the phone and said it was my boyfriend calling, so I answered "Hello, Love!" It was my boss. FML
yuen
Australia
Not now, mate
Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML
Anonymous
Springfield, United States
Happy dance
Today, at work, I was on the toilet for so long the motion lights turned off. I stood up, pants around my ankles and began waving my arms above the stall to get them to turn on again. At that exact moment, my boss walked in. FML
PeePee
United States
We heard you
Today, at work I had to use the bathroom. I asked my boss to watch my register and quickly walked into the bathroom. I squatted down and peed. A minute later I heard someone ask over our walkie talkie system who was using the bathroom. I had been pressing the intercom button while I peed. FML
Username
Hello?
Today, at work, my phone rang. My intern answered it and told me it was a coworker who'd just left. I picked up and said "What's up bitch? What are you going to complain about now?!" It was actually my boss. FML
Sonic
United States
Hey guys, check this out
Today, I was on a conference call while in the bathroom with all the important people in my district. I thought my phone was on mute, so I took the opportunity to flush the toilet. Turns out, that my phone wasn't on mute, and everyone heard it. I'm the only one who was on the conference call outside of work. FML
Anonymous
Fort Lauderdale, United States
Thanks dad…
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Anon
Auckland, New Zealand
Today, I took a phone call in the bathroom, since the rest of the house was too noisy. I sat down on the toilet and waited while they put me on hold. After a while, I must have forgotten the lid was down and my pants were still on, because I started peeing myself. FML
Top comments
evaki1 12
Boss: Hello?? Op: ARGHHHHHH HMPHHH
every1luvsboners 11
Talking shit to your boss isn't a good way to move up the corporate ladder. Although battle ***** might just do the trick.
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Comments (139)
truehitman2010 0
first
ILoveDaWorld 5
that's a fail.... and don't do that it's really anyoning
XThe_Invoker 4
I see you 2nd ;p My screen might be wrong, hahah
evaki1 12
Boss: Hello?? Op: ARGHHHHHH HMPHHH
nalia18 8
Shouldnt talk shit to your boss like that...
Nutty4Muffs 3
Nalia, idc if it's your comment, +1 cause you made me giggle. And this time, not from your picture. kudos :)
Nutty4Muffs 3
... that is, until I read boner's comment. -1
pie29302930 0
I like boobies :D
hinchkongfang 0
Hello boss?? Your turds stink!!
evry1luvspuns 0
He pocket dialed his boss like a boss
MrPedoBear_fml 4
I was in the third stall. >__>
Brandi_Faith 34
Why would his boss answer the phone when he's on the toilet in the first place! Is that a normal thing for him to do? Everytime you go to the bathroom you have to be careful not to make too much noise cause your boss could be on a conference call!
ShyAnn29 15
That'd be awkward to be on a conference call, and hear someone grunting trying to take a dump in the background
EvilPotato 15
66 I was in the fourth stall...
False_Stupidity 42
#49, 34's comment was made about 5 minutes before boners, she gets a +1 from me.
Rvah07 0
I was in the fifth
peteyfas 8
Let's go Buffalo!!!
ohxdamnxkay02 12
should of just fist bumped and called it a day :)
nava1210 12
I would have started singing "sitting on the toilet"
ZzkekekezZ 0
Hahahahaha
massacreman3000 1
first also, lol
ILoveDaWorld 5
even more of a fail and also stop saying... first! it's stupid
Blacksxe 1
Did you talk to him?
lakaiskate 12
What makes you so sure the boss is male
UtterCatastrophe 4
The fact that OP said "HE answered."
lakaiskate 12
Yeah I'm sorry it's late, I read things that weren't there.
IscoreOnU 19
You mean you didn't read things that are there.
ILoveDaWorld 5
hahaha that's funny
rkmepm 16
what crappy situation to be in!
evaki1 12
No shit?!
every1luvsboners 11
Talking shit to your boss isn't a good way to move up the corporate ladder. Although battle ***** might just do the trick.
iEthan 5
Why do you only have 175 comments? You had like 4,000. Did your account get banned?
every1luvsboners 11
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth. That's what happened.
rkmepm 16
I took the one less traveled by,. And that has made all the difference. ;)
rkmepm 16
metaphorically speaking of course
Buttsexpirate 9
Robert frost?
bloodshedblack 5
I ******* love this guy!!! Hahahahahahhhhaaahhhhh
fatgirllovesfml 0
Read this while i was In the toilet. Awkward.....
marinus_fml 20
Thats IS awkward! Wtf were you doing in the toilet? I'm usually on the toilet, or standing in front of it.
illmatic2 16
16: Don't act like you've never done it before.
TheDeadlyTurtle 7
Maybe he doesn't have a shower lol jk. The sink just doesn't clean the feet as well as the toilet
ShyAnn29 15
Maybe 8 fell in the toilet, while reading FMLs
fatgirllovesfml 0
If it weren't for FML I wouldn't go to the bathroom anyways:)
raphanne_fml 33
#105 Why? FML facilitates your intestinal transit? :)
laden_swallow09 35
8 - Not awkward. Ironic. If it were awkward, your own boss would be in the next stall in a public restroom, listening to you laugh to these FMLs… but your boss wouldn't know what you were laughing at.
skyeyez9 25
In all honesty, I think most fmls are read while on the toilet.
CurlyGurlF 6
lol so sad
Decapitation 3
"Sorry boss, I pocket dailed you." Catastrophe averted.
iloveshim 14
Or you could just hang up and say sorry very loudly ;)
chelseaaababyyy 17
its funny how they both said pretty much the same thing but one gets thumbed up and one gets thumbed down, lol.
iloveshim 14
Haha right?
saranndipidy 0
phone lock was invented for people like you, just sayin'
wtfcammelcheese 0
Why's their boss on speed dial....
kut19 6
Sounds like a crappy situation. Someone had to say it.
iloveshim 14
Clever word play I like it. :D
iloveeyouuxD 9
Usually says "shitty" situation, but whatever lol