Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I'm extremely uncomfortable with eye contact, but he kept staring into my eyes the entire time. I had to sing the F.U.N. song from Spongebob in my head to stop myself having an anxiety attack. FML
A lot of people with anxiety problems have issues with eye contact and it isn't as easy as just 'dealing' with it. That is really rude, as is assuming you can just get therapy for that. But I doubt #104 meant any harm. As someone who does suffer from general and social anxiety, it gets a little easier the more I work with the person or situation but even now I still get mildly uncomfortable holding eye contact during normal social situations with friends I've had for nearly a decade. So I cant even imagine prolonged contact during intimate ones. And for some people its a 'trigger' of some sort for other mental or emotional issues. Think about other people's personal history before you speak, please.
"And then we'll do it doggie style
So we can both watch X-Files
(Do it now)
You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals
So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel"
Actually, for your first time, it's best to do it in that position. That's how humans have sex in nature, so your body is more at ease in that position
JuliaaNoelle 26
Face down, ass up. That's the way we...
Tie our shoes
I'm sorry but how old are you op? I understand everyone has issues and their own ways of dealing/coping with stress and anxiety but that really seems quite juvenile, like something a 12 year old would do.
homesuckfucker 28
Actually, it's common for adults to have anxiety disorders.
Attacksloth 33
That's not really fair. To an outside observer, these fears might seem illogical, but that's what a fear is - illogical. It only makes sense to the person who has the fear, and to them it can range from slight anxiety, to a complete nightmare. We all have anxiety, but some of us have it to the point where it controls our life.
#23 Well i mean some fear isn't illogical, ie. fear of heights, fear of losing a loved one, fear of dying alone, etc. But i agree there are a lot of people with irrational fears, ie. fear of long words, fear of the color orange, fear of toilets (reference to the recent fml).
#34 people have those fears for a reason and shouldn't be judged for it. And for the last FML she had a fear of a toilet because she was little and was shown something that scared her. She didn't know better. If they really fear something they obviously have a reason have a reason for it and should get help.
Bruh. People with anxiety disorder deal with it in a way that helps them. She probably used that one was its steady, repetitive, and familiar. And like, for real? I'm 22 and I still watch spongebob. I have an office job, a fiancé, and a house of my own. And I still ******* watch spongebob. Stop being a judge mental prick.
#51 - The fact that you think you can justify your juvenile interest in some awful children's cartoon with irrelevant factors about your life just proves the point. (Not that I really care that you like Spongebob.)
I mean, would you say it's okay to listen to the Barney Song when somebody breaks up with us?
#63 people deal with things in different ways. If someone wants to listen to the Barney song after a break up, then let them do that. You might not do it, but someone else could. It really isn't based off how you deal with it, it's whether or not you feel better in the end. If someone in your family died, and you deal with it by crying, no one judges you and you might feel better in the end. But if someone deals with the death of a family member by going out and playing sports to relieve their stress, they shouldn't be judged either. Because in the end, you both eventually feel better, you just used different methods
So you've never rewatched a TV show from your childhood? You're probably too mature for that though. Don't just ignore things you like so people won't judge you. If something makes you happy, do it...and yes, this includes singing the Barney song.
#69 - Yep, thanks for stating that. I guess I wasn't clear; I really don't care what people like, but justifying your interests by stating "I'm a stable member of society" makes you seem, as it was put before, juvenile. And surely if you find the F.U.N song from Spongebob comforting, it's the same deal.
Good sex takes practice. If most people were honest, they would admit the first time was, at most, "meh".
sourgirl101 29
Not all of us. My first time was a great experience. My BF (husband now) didn't rush me and made sure I was okay. Yes, losing my virginity hurt but it was a good pain, if that makes sense?
Top comments
Boopycat 15
Could have just closed your eyes?
GOtllt 17
Try telling him that you don't like it, and he'll probably stop.,Maybe he thinks you enjoy it?
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Comments (153)
Boopycat 15
Could have just closed your eyes?
kmaheynoway 25
"If I can't see you, you can't see me."
domolovesyoshi 33
I'd she gets panic attacks from eye contact she probably has issues with closing her eyes too
bethrh 49
I doubt that would stop him staring at her though.
norse21 7
Haha, my first time I had the song highway to hell playing in my head. Lol
DARKDAY07 16
great sex song
tazloona 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Deal with it
ohjoy15 33
Why?... This is a free country. You're allowed to tell people if something bothers you.
hope27 15
#3 you want her to deal with something that might make her have a panic attack during sex? Sex is supposed to be enjoyable dude.
shessohighh 10
Honestly I don't have a problem with eye contact and that still sounds creepy as ****.
Fayern 13
A lot of people with anxiety problems have issues with eye contact and it isn't as easy as just 'dealing' with it. That is really rude, as is assuming you can just get therapy for that. But I doubt #104 meant any harm. As someone who does suffer from general and social anxiety, it gets a little easier the more I work with the person or situation but even now I still get mildly uncomfortable holding eye contact during normal social situations with friends I've had for nearly a decade. So I cant even imagine prolonged contact during intimate ones. And for some people its a 'trigger' of some sort for other mental or emotional issues. Think about other people's personal history before you speak, please.
tazloona 8
Shouldn't be
GOtllt 17
Try telling him that you don't like it, and he'll probably stop.,Maybe he thinks you enjoy it?
tossaway2321 5
Or maybe he watches a lot of **** cause **** stars really eye **** the camera for some reason
renjisgirl12 22
Do it doggy style! No eye-contact that way!
Enslaved 38
Face down, ass up That's the way we like to ****!
tygerarmy 35
"And then we'll do it doggie style So we can both watch X-Files (Do it now) You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel"
wyverntail 15
Actually, for your first time, it's best to do it in that position. That's how humans have sex in nature, so your body is more at ease in that position
JuliaaNoelle 26
Face down, ass up. That's the way we... Tie our shoes
Chicagoillinois 18
#36 you don't deserve to be disliked I just don't think people get the reference of the song, I ******* love it so congrats to you! Cx
bethrh 49
Doggy style's the best way to do it
SmallBean 12
Down in the deep blue sea?
RobinGoodfellow 47
I wish you hadn't posted this so many times, I got tired of moderating it.
Dalboz 26
talk to him.communication is an important thing. I'm sure he would have stopped if you would have asked
StickyPickles 33
I'm sorry but how old are you op? I understand everyone has issues and their own ways of dealing/coping with stress and anxiety but that really seems quite juvenile, like something a 12 year old would do.
homesuckfucker 28
Actually, it's common for adults to have anxiety disorders.
Attacksloth 33
That's not really fair. To an outside observer, these fears might seem illogical, but that's what a fear is - illogical. It only makes sense to the person who has the fear, and to them it can range from slight anxiety, to a complete nightmare. We all have anxiety, but some of us have it to the point where it controls our life.
201chasew 22
#23 That's how I am with spiders or other bugs. It can be the size of a needle point, but I will still freak out if it gets on me.
BeastyMcbeast 19
#23 Well i mean some fear isn't illogical, ie. fear of heights, fear of losing a loved one, fear of dying alone, etc. But i agree there are a lot of people with irrational fears, ie. fear of long words, fear of the color orange, fear of toilets (reference to the recent fml).
annarcheer 19
#34 people have those fears for a reason and shouldn't be judged for it. And for the last FML she had a fear of a toilet because she was little and was shown something that scared her. She didn't know better. If they really fear something they obviously have a reason have a reason for it and should get help.
TransitLetum 9
Ok people, calm down. I'm pretty sure he was talking about the Spongebob song, not the actual anxiety attack.
StickyPickles 33
I was talking about the song and not at all bashing on the op for having anxiety problems. Glad everyone sees that.
kbug95 12
Bruh. People with anxiety disorder deal with it in a way that helps them. She probably used that one was its steady, repetitive, and familiar. And like, for real? I'm 22 and I still watch spongebob. I have an office job, a fiancé, and a house of my own. And I still ******* watch spongebob. Stop being a judge mental prick.
MrConcise 35
#51 - The fact that you think you can justify your juvenile interest in some awful children's cartoon with irrelevant factors about your life just proves the point. (Not that I really care that you like Spongebob.) I mean, would you say it's okay to listen to the Barney Song when somebody breaks up with us?
Ltsdragons 19
#63 people deal with things in different ways. If someone wants to listen to the Barney song after a break up, then let them do that. You might not do it, but someone else could. It really isn't based off how you deal with it, it's whether or not you feel better in the end. If someone in your family died, and you deal with it by crying, no one judges you and you might feel better in the end. But if someone deals with the death of a family member by going out and playing sports to relieve their stress, they shouldn't be judged either. Because in the end, you both eventually feel better, you just used different methods
immaloser95 28
So you've never rewatched a TV show from your childhood? You're probably too mature for that though. Don't just ignore things you like so people won't judge you. If something makes you happy, do it...and yes, this includes singing the Barney song.
cwhitt975 11
They're talking about how she sang a song from spongebob to deal with her anxiety
MrConcise 35
#69 - Yep, thanks for stating that. I guess I wasn't clear; I really don't care what people like, but justifying your interests by stating "I'm a stable member of society" makes you seem, as it was put before, juvenile. And surely if you find the F.U.N song from Spongebob comforting, it's the same deal.
Shake_It_Off 6
That sucks..
ndnpride88 25
Hopefully the sex was good lol.
SMHsohard 22
Good sex takes practice. If most people were honest, they would admit the first time was, at most, "meh".
sourgirl101 29
Not all of us. My first time was a great experience. My BF (husband now) didn't rush me and made sure I was okay. Yes, losing my virginity hurt but it was a good pain, if that makes sense?
garrett_8614 14
^Don't see why that's downvoted
tossaway2321 5
Yea I really don't get what you mean by it hurt (might be cause I'm not a girl)