Today, I began to sign "I love you" to my boyfriend from across the room. I ended up just poking myself in the eye. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. It was going well until our braces got caught. Out of pain, I tried to pull away, which made my eyes water. Then I sneezed in his mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were play-wrestling on the bed, when he started to tickle me. I tried to pull away but he pushed me back down. I ended up hitting my eye on the corner of the nightstand. His comment was "this is why you shouldn't struggle." FML
Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML
Today, I reached to pick out a booger stuck in my nose that had been irritating me, and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, I was on a date and tried to act seductive and mysterious by slowly sipping my drink while making eye contact with him. I misjudged the straw’s length and location and ended up poking myself in the eye. FML
Today, I did something clever at work and I was telling one of the other girls about it. I said "Just using my noodle" and went to tap my temple but instead I jabbed myself in the eye. FML
Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek and told her I love her. She punched me in the ear. FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. He responded by fist pumping. FML
Today, my boyfriend elbowed me in the eye while we were sleeping. His excuse: "You shouldn't have stayed over." FML
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Top comments
jerryj 27
I can picture it happened like this: • you made eye contact with eachother • you smiled at him • while smiling you slowly poked your eye • he was confused
biasedshooter 24
P-p-p-pokerface
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Comments (47)
allie2590 31
Maybe it's a sign.
whos_ur_daddy1 19
Not meant to be
Kyle1dc 17
Love is cruel?
cryssycakesx3 23
I saw the sign, and it opened up my eyes.....
biasedshooter 24
P-p-p-pokerface
Sakuraashita 15
She gotta love nobody.
Kyle1dc 17
Love is a battlefield.
jerryj 27
I can picture it happened like this: • you made eye contact with eachother • you smiled at him • while smiling you slowly poked your eye • he was confused
gracehi 33
Love hurts...
DiamondGirlj 18
Weather it's right or wrong
mattrd_fml 31
whether*
mallu86 9
And it is blind.
False_Stupidity 42
Now it is anyhow.
askullnamedbilly 33
How was you trying to sing to him connected to the eye poking incident?
mariamilian 20
Read the FML again. Sign, not sing..
cjwayy 22
I have no idea what the hell #5 just said
askullnamedbilly 33
Yup, my bad. I'm dyslexic, it happens.
headofmedusa 15
I'm not dyslexic but I read sing at first too.
oreoeater 21
Oooooooh... Sign... Right that makes so much more sense now
sunnyray812 42
I was very confused with this FML because I kept reading it as "sing" also.
fuckyourlifeOP 25
I'm glad somebody pointed out that it said sign. I was picturing it like: *sings* "I looove yooou!" *pokes herself in the eye whilst trying to wipe a tear of joy*
kyuubi1 14
well at least you made eye contact.
Michael903 18
If all works out, it'll be a great sorry for your kids and grandkids!
tony1891 22
love at first sight?
mariamilian 20
You were blinded by love.
mrwilsong 6
Eye bet you didn't see that coming
syki 22
That's the cornea-st pun I've ever heard.
Kyle1dc 17
I'm blinded by the wording of these puns.
oreoeater 21
Eye was touched
cryssycakesx3 23
i-ris the pupils of FML would stop with the eye puns. you deserve 40 lashes..
cryssycakesx3 23
I'm sorry that was so terrible. please bury it and spare me a bit of shame...
brians3395 4
how can your eye bet something? that makes no sense at all.
mrwilsong 6
Yeah you guys king of ruined the puns