Today, I'm spending the night with the guy I've been interested in for a while. Instead of sleeping in the same bed together, he insists that I sleep in another room because he "doesn't want to be tempted to do anything." So, I'm alone, in my best lingerie, in his little brother's room. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I really wanted to spend a night of passion with my lover, so I'd arranged to meet him in a very classy hotel, gave him the room number, and waited for him in a super-sexy outfit. There was a knock at the door, so I opened it slowly and enticingly, assuming it was him. It was room service. FML
Today, I'm cheering myself up about being newly single by having a sleepover with my best friends. Their boyfriends have all decided to sleep over as well though, so I'm currently alone in a corridor with nothing but the sound of all my friends having loud sex to keep me company. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend to spend the night at my house because my dad would be working out of town, and once the rest of the house left I thought it'd be sweet if he snuck in my room and slept with me. His reply was, "Why bother? You're on your period, it's not like we can do anything." FML
Today, I got to sleep in the same bed as the love of my life...and her new boyfriend. FML
Today, I spent my first night at my boyfriend's place, and my first night sleeping beside him. I woke up in the early hours to him holding me and muttering in his sleep something like "surprise fisting". I'm beyond terrified. FML
Today, I went over to the house of a guy I have hooked up with a few times. After we got done, I asked him why we were not in the room across the hall. He said that was his twin brother's room. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I have an extra key. I snuck into his bed with sleep with him and noticed how soft his skin was. Turns out I had been feeling up the girl he was sleeping with and he was in the bathroom. FML
Today, I spent 100 dollars on lingerie. I put it on, walked out to the living room, and told my boyfriend to follow me into the bedroom. He said no, then pretended to fall asleep. FML
Today, excited that I finally got a place of my own, I invited my boyfriend over for a sexy sleep over. He told me his mom doesn't want him sleeping over. He's 21 years old. FML
Today, my 26-year-old boyfriend came to my apartment to spend the night for the first time. He brought a "blankie" that he insisted was the only thing that could help him sleep. That "blankie" was his ex-girlfriend's silk nightgown. FML
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Top comments
Flammin8 0
respect his wishes?
BelleElle_fml 5
Aw, what a gentleman. You've got a keeper, OP!
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Comments (149)
Alleged_Cranium 7
If you can't please yourself, try using your other hand.
drake222 3
"like"
Claytonic 0
Mormons ftw!
cguinn17 9
what's a mormon?
DocBastard 40
You are. Oh...morMon. Right, nevermind.
JavIin 0
*Likes DocBastard's comment*
cguinn17 9
awww sad day! i've lived it Utah for the past 5 years, every one here is Mormon or knows one, i was hoping to get an outside opinion lol
Mons_fml 27
mormons are stupid, srsly
n0obpr0 4
and then females be talking shit about us being manwhores...smh
kristi_nisbett 0
how is this an fml? r u a nympho or something??
perdix 31
Maybe you'll get lucky and the little brother will come home . . . and not be so little ;)
Nutz321 0
Alice?!? Is that you?
collegegirl87 0
I agree! Its annoying.
collegegirl87 0
*It's. Gahh stupid phone.
yummycupcakegirl 0
So, he just wants to save himself for someone special. If you really like him youll respect him.
imhowie 2
Are you really that horny?
gelica87 0
horny much??? lol
zlut 0
Well.. A real man can feel temptation and STILL have control over himself!
starile 20
Yeah, but she wanted to have sex, so she'd push for it. He can control himself all he can, but if she keeps attempting to force it, he's gonna wind up kicking her out of the room at some point.