Today, my girlfriend gave me a choice of having a circumcision or breaking up with her. Either way I'm going to lose something I hold dear. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she'd support my decision to stay in, or get out of the military, so I renewed my contract...... She broke up with me for it. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, the man I thought I'd marry dumped me in a parking lot, because I insisted that any boys would be circumcised so my son wouldn't be confused. He literally said, "Circumcision is a deal breaker. Get out of my car." FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that her parents have a bet going on when we are going to break up. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of a bad haircut. She was the one who cut my hair. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to give her my phone's passcode. FML
Today, I found out that I need a hysterectomy. When I told my boyfriend of 2 years, he broke up with me, because he didn't have time to "coddle my feelings". FML
Today, I got the haircut I've been wanting for ages. I then called my girlfriend of two years and asked what she would do if I got a haircut. She told me she would dump me and then invited me to her house for dinner. I'm scared to go. FML
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Top comments
Sparx1_1 16
Lose the girl. It's one thing if she wants you to change your hair style it's another thing entirely to chop off a piece of your dick for no valid medical reason.
mariri9206 32
Agreed. You can find a better girl. You shouldn't have to be in a relationship where there are ultimatums, especially ones that involve unnecessary surgery.
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Comments (99)
Sparx1_1 16
Lose the girl. It's one thing if she wants you to change your hair style it's another thing entirely to chop off a piece of your dick for no valid medical reason.
mariri9206 32
Agreed. You can find a better girl. You shouldn't have to be in a relationship where there are ultimatums, especially ones that involve unnecessary surgery.
breedles 28
^this. Ultimatums are the worst kind of thing to throw around in a relationship, and honestly, if she thinks "get a medically unnecessary modification to your genitals or I will leave you" is an okay thing to throw at you she needs to go
Dracothius 1
Actually, there is a medical reason. It is harder to maintain cleanliness down there. With a little extra work its fine, all but it is a medical problem. I work in a ER and we have kids come in every so often because they are uncircumcised and have infections down there. She shouldnt leave him over it and he should ditch her for not accepting him the way he wants to be but I wanted to clarify the medical thing.
moondoglou420 17
Tell her you'll get one if she does.
illicitus 6
Exactly
Dave_Davington 34
Tell her that you'll do it if she has a labiaplasty. See how she likes it.
WhatHappenedToIt 22
you do know that's not the same thing as female circumsicion right? some women choose to have their vaginas reguvinated which includes a vaginoplasty and a labiaplasty to make it all look nice and new and shiny. not the same thing.
Dave_Davington 34
Semantics. Either way, (in this specific scenario) you're cutting off a bit of your genitals solely so that your partner doesn't leave you. Surely we can agree that that's utterly ******, yes?
Alvey_fml 0
Why would she want you to cut your foreskin off? I mean unless it's causing you a health risk I wouldn't do it. No relationship is worth that pain.
iSsjGohan 18
maybe for religion?
Mudhound123 6
If it was for religion he would have done it when he was born. If it's for her religion, tough luck. That doesn't mean he should get it done.
mssileas 25
It's your body and your decision. Talking about preferences would be one thing, but an ultimatum is never healthy in this regard. If a piece of skin is more important to her than everything else about this relationship, you're probably the only one in this arrangement who holds it dear.
maritime1992 5
She sounds like a loser. Ditch the bitch.
LadyLenore 14
I kinda have to agree with them. However valid her reasons may be for you to get a circumcision (health, sexual pleasure,...) if she's making you choose between that and her, and you were to choose her, she's got leverage on you for your entire relationship. What she wants or you lose her. Plus let's look at this objectivly, if she's willing to dump you over this cosmetical little issue, she doesn't value your relationship much now does she....
Limeila 10
About sexual pleasure, if anything circumsion diminishes it, it doesn't increase.
finalyearsofhate 22
As far as sexual pleasure goes, it's better for both with the guy intact. There is only a cosmetic issue in the US. Pretty much everywhere else in the world doesn't mutilate children for no reason.
SneezyBear 27
I married an American, with conservative(ish) Christian parents, and I remember asking at some point early on, in a nervous way, if he'd gotten circumcised, and he replied - equally nervous - that he hadn't. Which came as a huge relief to me - and my relief came as a huge relief to him, because he'd been teased for it in school and he'd had previous girlfriends pressure him to get a circumcision. His mum apparently decided she would let him make the choice when he was older. Phew.
QueenAfrodite 8
Exactly. My King is in tact and he's the only black man I have met who is. We live in the US but I never had an issue with it. The sex is better. And I'm really happy because if we have a son I don't have to worry about arguing about not mutilating my kids genitals.
blairvic 23
DON'T DO IT OP! Natural is beautiful and any judgmental woman who wants you to mutilate yourself isn't the right one for you. Losing sensation in your part isn't worth some woman.
mattyiscool123 26
Come on it's not that beautiful.
A7XCamaro 19
a dick is never beautiful, the women get the good looking parts.
crystal71669 10
Why does she want you to do that? Maybe there are issues with cleanliness and if so...yuck! Clean under the foreskin well!
illicitus 6
The only thing that needs to be cut is her out of your life. She seems beyond controlling. Good luck to you OP