Today, my girlfriend gave me a choice of having a circumcision or breaking up with her. Either way I'm going to lose something I hold dear. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend of 3 weeks gave me an ultimatum: marry her, or she kills herself. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she'd support my decision to stay in, or get out of the military, so I renewed my contract...... She broke up with me for it. FML
Today, I've been considering breaking up with my girlfriend so I don't have to buy her a Christmas present. FML
Today, the man I thought I'd marry dumped me in a parking lot, because I insisted that any boys would be circumcised so my son wouldn't be confused. He literally said, "Circumcision is a deal breaker. Get out of my car." FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that her parents have a bet going on when we are going to break up. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because of a bad haircut. She was the one who cut my hair. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to give her my phone's passcode. FML
Today, I found out that I need a hysterectomy. When I told my boyfriend of 2 years, he broke up with me, because he didn't have time to "coddle my feelings". FML
Today, I got the haircut I've been wanting for ages. I then called my girlfriend of two years and asked what she would do if I got a haircut. She told me she would dump me and then invited me to her house for dinner. I'm scared to go. FML
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Top comments
Sparx1_1 16
Lose the girl. It's one thing if she wants you to change your hair style it's another thing entirely to chop off a piece of your dick for no valid medical reason.
mariri9206 32
Agreed. You can find a better girl. You shouldn't have to be in a relationship where there are ultimatums, especially ones that involve unnecessary surgery.
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Comments (99)
ThrottleJockey 36
Jew gotta be kidding me!
TabooSushi 24
Okay, while I personally prefer a circumcised man myself, I have to say that it is MAJORLY F'ed up of her to demand that you change a part of your body just to suit her desires. Tell her that you'll do it if she gets a boob job. Same thing, really. All cosmetic work, no real medical purpose. Ditch the witch, you don't need her.
bulletsinthewind 21
Lose her. That's a pretty screwed up move on her part. You don't need someone like that
Royally_shunned 15
I hope you told her you're not gonna do this. Also follow up would be nice.
Verscharren 5
Get rid of her
Mixed_steel 23
You can get another girlfriend. You can't get another foreskin. She'll come up with worse ultimatums given the chance.
RichardPencil 32
Give up the ugly hat.
Catdragon 40
Well it all depends on if you're washing it properly. Perhaps you're not giving it a thorough cleaning before sex and it grosses her out? If it's just a cosmetic issue, then she can take a hike.
gracehi 33
Then the ultimatum should be "Clean your dick better" not "cut off a piece of your dick." I'm sure her ****** doesn't always smell like roses either.
heyLaddieHey 18
There will be other girlfriends! For the love of God dump her.
caliguy08 17
It's only foreskin man....
A7XCamaro 19
and? It's a good thing to have.