Today, I was talking on the phone to my crush so I went into the bathroom for some privacy. My drunk mother started banging on the door, asking what I was doing in there. I told her that I was on the phone, so she yelled super loud, "While you're shitting?" He immediately hung up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought I could stay on the phone and go to the bathroom without him noticing. My mom knocks on the door and without even thinking, I yelled "I'M ON THE TOILET!" He said "ew.." FML
Today, I was on the toilet, when the girl I really like decided to call. I'd left my cellphone in my room and my dad answered. All he said was, "He's taking a shit. This might take a while." and hung up. FML
Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML
Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML
Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML
Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML
Today, the phone rang while I was on the toilet. I asked my 3-year-old daughter to answer it, only for her to loudly say, "Mommy's on the toilet pooping." FML
Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML
Today, my fiancé and I met his mother for lunch to discuss wedding plans. When we got there, I went to the bathroom to wash my hands. I heard a woman talking on her cell phone in the stall about her son's "disgusting, slutty girlfriend." The toilet flushed and my future mother-in-law walked out. FML
Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
WCARlover 35
Drunk mothers say the darndest things :p but that was really immature of him to hang up without letting you explain yourself
CinderellaC 4
I would have just laughed if I were him.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (101)
gibsonFML 0
this reminds me of Howard from the Big Bang Theory
laughingat 1
Did you shat when he hung up?
annalily5 28
Hey, you were hogging the bathroom for talking. I'd be annoyed if someone spent hours on the phone in the bathroom rather than go outside or to their room. Some people actually do need to shit and piss. Your mother may not have handled it the best, ad I'm sorry you have to deal with a drunk mom, but you should still be considerate of the fact some people might want to use the restroom for its intended purpose.
clok555 1
Aww. I bet your a nice girl too
lol32360 0
you could have put the phone on mute
funneybunney1 0
That's gatta suck):
FMLxAllxThexTime 7
What happened after that? Did you have to explain it to him?
FluffyMommy 0
Thank you for making my entire day! Trying not to laugh out loud, I farted... in a quiet office setting.
VictoriaaGreenn 4
That's a shitty way to end a phone call.
Rory98 4
That just made my dayXD