Pretend

Why not?

Today, my girlfriend confessed to me that she wants to dress me up in her clothes, with a wig and makeup. FML

Try it, you never know…

Today, my husband came home with a bunch of realistic-looking wigs for women. When I asked them what they were for, he said he wanted to spice up our sex life with them. When I told him I refused to wear a wig, he said in a very serious tone that I wasn't going to be the one wearing them, he was. FML

Groucho

Today, my boyfriend tried to make me wear a fake mustache during sex. He said it "turns him on." FML

Today, my girlfriend decided to get a new haircut. Now, she hates the haircut and blames me for, in her words, "turning me into something I'm not." FML

Hard act to follow

Today, my girlfriend threatened to leave me if I didn't follow her latest fad of becoming a goth, which involves dressing like an undertaker's haunted hearse and putting on eyeliner. Last week she was into Reggae and beanie hats. FML

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

Today, a little girl asked me if I was wearing a wig. It's my real hair. FML

Fantasy

Today, my boyfriend convinced me to go crazy and get a short haircut, then dye it all pink. When we got home he wanted sex, and he'd bought me a military uniform to wear, which is when I realised he was trying to turn me into one of his anime girls FML

Today, my girlfriend and I made love. She stared at her One Direction poster the whole time. FML

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML