Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my girlfriend wanted to role-play non-consensual sex. I was already uncomfortable with the idea, and when she started begging, "No, no" as I stripped her, I dropped the role-play and walked out. Now she's pissed at me. I'm sorry, but this is fucking creepy. FML
Today, my girlfriend wanted to roleplay as a schoolgirl. I was excited, until we started and she asked me to lick her "vajayjay". I cringed so hard, my skull practically caved in. I broke down laughing while trying to explain my cringing. Now she's pissed and I'm blue-balled. FML
Today, I had a dream where I was giving Justin Bieber a blowjob. I'm a totally straight male. I have half a mind to bill the little bastard for therapy sessions. FML
Today, I was trying to be dirty with my fiancé. He got really into the roleplaying and wouldn't stop pretending to be a cop for hours. Mood officially killed. FML
Today, my girlfriend admitted she had a nightmare about having sex with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend convinced me to do some bedroom roleplay, and we decided on acting out a job interview scenario. I suggestively told her that if she wanted to get the job, she'd have to use her mouth on something else first. She called me a pig and ended the roleplay right there. FML
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job when she started crying. Despite my pleas for her to stop and attempts to comfort her, she insisted that she continue. I feel like a monster. FML
Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting pretty hot and heavy, then he said, "Let's pretend you're someone else." FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Did you scream "baby, baby, baby, ooh..."?
cmayer 20
I am so very sorry for your misfortune.
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Comments (250)
Welshite 40
Did you scream "baby, baby, baby, ooh..."?
alexwow1 13
Ha this is hilarious
SmallyBigs 9
Your girlfriend must have lesbian desires.
Flowsidon 6
69 thumbs up
Colubras 6
Little known fact, OP actually had to play catcher ( as the biebs normally does ) and that is why he is so physically ill
ShakeDisPlace 10
#67 Well, that is why I am taking his man card away.
dogpfcorn 11
Doesn't matter had sex!
Pwn17 25
True 102. We can joke about it all we want, but at the end of the day, OP was the one who got laid!
ex_stripper_jk 20
Girl, quit playin'
NakedPixels 15
That was the first song to pop into my head.
cmayer 20
I am so very sorry for your misfortune.
hemz_fml 13
All you have to do is put on some muscle, nothing like beiber then
graffitied_love 20
I don't want to think about how exactly he fore played as him... a Beiber wig??
patrickalamo 48
Role playing Bieber, would that include having legions of fans who would die for you or the ability to get some hot tail for a change. YDI, OP.
spoo 24
Tell her she is an ugly man and flip her over..... She just agreed to something else too :o
weezypanda420 22
Awe man I feel bad for him too. Hope she grows up one day
zed34 18
I would dump her!
JACKxRAWR 22
Not extreme enough. Bash her brains in with the nearest heavy blunt object and run off to live in the forest for the next fifty years OP.
\ 28
Or "come out" to her stating that JB changed OP's sexuality
BntyHntrSeattle 30
Hey is your profile picture actually you? Also- your comment is so original k' bye.
nikolkaw 9
Never say never....
grahmagog 14
Theres no scraping that scar from the innards of your cranium
JACKxRAWR 22
He can cleanse himself with his girlfriend's blood.
Warmonger_Smurf 29
Tomorrow she should really do something hot for you.
snugglesMcGee199 23
Yeah! OP think up the weirdest fantasy yoy have evet had and telk her she owes you!
Co1121 11
Make her role play as Ariana Grande
iAlissa 34
Run.
ShakeDisPlace 10
Your man card OP?? Hand it over.
AngrySailor 17
I'm thinking it has not been issued yet.
hopsinlove17 26
Or it's been revoked.
Ki11erC 18
It's definitely been revoked. Not that my gf even listens to that trash but there is no way in hell she would get me role play that woman!
TheDrifter 24
Did she make you wear a Beiber wig? It's not total humiliation without the wig.
ScenicSubterfuge 39
....did you take a shower? You might need one!
ShakeDisPlace 10
OP might want to take A cold shower, to get rid of the "Beiber Fever"
rg350dx 29
There isn't enough soap and water in the world to cleanse OP of that dirty deed.
Sandsh8rk 36
I don't blame you. Maybe just say you never want to do that again?