Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while celebrating my birthday, my friends hired a few escorts to make the party more interesting. This was a really bad way to learn that my sister is a prostitute. FML
Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML
Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML
Today, I went to a birthday party at my girlfriend's house. When her little brother was about to blow out the candles, I slipped my hand into her sister's back pocket and squeezed her ass, thinking it was my girlfriend. She freaked out, and now her family thinks I'm a pervert. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited. I had just finished planning a surprise party for her. FML
Today, I found out the girl my husband's been calling "Sister" isn't actually his sister, but instead a hooker whose work name is "Sister". FML
Today, I walked in on my sister and a few of my roommates planning a surprise party for a fellow roommate whose birthday is a week away. My birthday was yesterday. No one remembered. Not even my own sister. FML
Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML
Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "What birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML
Today, is my little sister's 16th birthday. I spent my last $20 on a gift for her, cleaned the house for her party, made an ice cream cake, and got her a rose. What did I get? "I hope you kept the receipt for this. Oh, and stay in your room during my party." FML
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Top comments
redshortsx 0
oh wow your sister was the stripper at your birthday. that's ******* gross
Pankreas 0
Uhm, of course this makes sense. He hired a stripper to jump out of a cake, and the stripper in the cake was his sister. Ouch.
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Comments (301)
jamie_sd 0
please
Matouche_fml 0
dayam my siter better not be a stripper and jump out of cakes
Darrian 2
lol. So did you hit it?
Moemoemoe_fml 0
I sure hope someone hits YOU, with a stick or something. :X
namhowell 6
I don't believe this FML. Does she not know what cake she's getting herself inside? With your birthday and name written on the cake, you would think she knows it's her brother's birthday she's being a stripper at. Or did she know and didn't care and plan to be gross and surprised you anyway? YDI for making up stories!
liveitupx 0
Of course she would care if shes stripping for her brother's birthday. But Jon is an extremely common name. If she's about to go strip, the last thing she's thinking about is her brother's birthday.
ilmlsm 0
Oh shit that's a little akward lol
VonHoolio 1
hahahahahahahahah
AxCxDxDx 0
Gratz!
jennay8288 1
aw, that sucks for the both of you, lol.
vexis58 1
I don't see where it says the sister was the one jumping out of the cake. I would assume that she'd recognize the name or the address at some point, and that's when she found out -- or a coworker of hers was the one in the cake, and she brought it up. Sister: Hey! Why are you hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake for your birthday? Brother: Hey! How did you know that? Sister: ..... I find it incredibly unlikely that neither of you would know until she jumped out of it.
deng314 0
Maybe the party was held at a friend's home and one of them also hired the stripper?? My friends and I have done that for another friend's bachelorette party.
Moemoemoe_fml 0
*high-fives organisedchaos* :D
BelaLugosisdead 0
Awwwwwwwwwwkkkkkward... >.>