Today, I found out my little sister was a stripper. At the same time, she found out that when I said I was having a "quiet birthday with some friends," what I really meant was "hiring a stripper to jump out of a cake." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while celebrating my birthday, my friends hired a few escorts to make the party more interesting. This was a really bad way to learn that my sister is a prostitute. FML
Today, my parents used my going away party as a cover up for my sister's surprise party. I didn't know until they brought out the cake. FML
Today, my friends and I went to the strip club for my birthday. I now know how my sister is paying for her new car. FML
Today, I went to a birthday party at my girlfriend's house. When her little brother was about to blow out the candles, I slipped my hand into her sister's back pocket and squeezed her ass, thinking it was my girlfriend. She freaked out, and now her family thinks I'm a pervert. FML
Today, I found out that my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited. I had just finished planning a surprise party for her. FML
Today, I found out the girl my husband's been calling "Sister" isn't actually his sister, but instead a hooker whose work name is "Sister". FML
Today, I walked in on my sister and a few of my roommates planning a surprise party for a fellow roommate whose birthday is a week away. My birthday was yesterday. No one remembered. Not even my own sister. FML
Today, I brought my best friend to the strip club as a birthday gift, as he had mentioned that he'd never been to one before. It might have been ruined by the discovery that his daughter had a new job. FML
Today, I found out my best friend was having a birthday party and I wasn't invited, so I asked her why. She replied, "What birthday party?" It was a surprise birthday party. FML
Today, is my little sister's 16th birthday. I spent my last $20 on a gift for her, cleaned the house for her party, made an ice cream cake, and got her a rose. What did I get? "I hope you kept the receipt for this. Oh, and stay in your room during my party." FML
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Top comments
redshortsx 0
oh wow your sister was the stripper at your birthday. that's ******* gross
Pankreas 0
Uhm, of course this makes sense. He hired a stripper to jump out of a cake, and the stripper in the cake was his sister. Ouch.
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Comments (301)
dangler6969 0
k
NewJoisey 0
i would love to know where your sister works at(depending if shes hot[most strippers are]). and no I am not being a 'jackass' or a 'horndog' or whatever you little kiddies are gonna say that is negative towards me, like seriously grow up and stop insulting people whom you've never met on the INTERNET. anyways, **** your life indeed. however, you have a sick incest household now :x f your family's reputations life!
Moemoemoe_fml 0
Dude, after the idiocy of the comment you left, you don't need to worry, you've done enough to prove your own stupidity, no need for us people of the internet to insult you any further. LOL It's epic fail to be lame enough to be asking for that, but you had to add more and more to it. XD
txgirl09 5
lol. Ouch. It's awkward-ly funny though.
JazzProphet 0
That's... Exciting in a creepy way... ()_()
NewJoisey 0
also @ azura94(#6) that's originally from new jersey, I hope you are from there or else you would be a theif! New Jersey invented awkward turtle. nuf said bruthas
cheeeesey 0
lmfao epiccc!
hedgehogs 0
I wish I had a videotape of that conversation. It really is funny as hell. I hope you get to where you can see that.
erinlpx 0
I can totally see how this went down afterwards. "Uh, I won't tell Mom and Dad you're a stripper, and you don't tell anyone I ordered a stripper cake just for myself. Oh, and here's a twenty, but I'm not putting it in THERE."
megan13_09 1
omg...this is no joke the best fml ever. i almost just died laughing! favorite! :)
urlifesfked 0
Woah! incest!!