Today, I saw my new pet fish completely missing the food at the bottom of his tank and sucking up the little rocks instead. My last dog died from eating rocks. I think I'm doomed to have insanely stupid pets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML
Today, my neighbor asked me to check in on his pet. When I went into his house, I couldn't find any animals. I searched all over, and finally gave up and called him. I asked him what type of pet he had. His response? "My pet rock, Stubby." That's right, I just spent some time looking for a rock. FML
Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML
Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
Today, while doing some spring cleaning, I found the remains of my goldfish, which I was sure my cat ate last year. FML
Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML
Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML
Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML
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Top comments
ARSCON 15
What about a pet rock?
SubparAtBest 23
Are you sure they're stupid? Maybe they're just stoned. Maybe it seemed like a solid plan at the time and now he's just hit rock bottom.
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Comments (89)
AmericanBadAss 21
Yeah, dude, you're doomed. Your life is over. I'm so sorry for you. So this is what passes for FMLs these days? Yawn.
carolinebaryo 6
it's completely natural for fish to do that
darianvilla 10
Or maybe your destined to have a Golem
Twisted_Angel 17
I think the problem isn't the animals... you really shouldn't have a pet if you know nothing about what they do. Fish don't eat the rocks. The suck them up, clean the food particles off, and spit them back out. I am curious why you would let your dog eat rocks...
LyricaSilvan 30
My only guess is that the dog was found chewing the rocks, and swallowed them before anyone realized it. But I suppose only OP truly knows.
Nickimariek 20
Pretty sure fish do that for a reason, idk why. Also fish food is made out of fish (watched how it was made once)
jvanevery 19
Common fish behavior. don't they turn around and spit the Rocks back out
LevelupKid 8
aww....
BrokeAtCollege 2
The fish will often pick up the rocks and spit them back out after a few second or s minute. They get all of the algae or whatnot off of the rocks as a way of eating. There might even be food stuck to them
KryssLB 14
Maybe this is your fish's way of telling you it's your dog, reincarnated. :P
SKYstlimit 11
all fish do that, it's not stupid it's getting the minerals off the rocks