Today, I saw my new pet fish completely missing the food at the bottom of his tank and sucking up the little rocks instead. My last dog died from eating rocks. I think I'm doomed to have insanely stupid pets. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my last remaining pet, a hamster, died. Even he thinks it's better to drown in his water dish than brave the world living with me. FML
Today, my neighbor asked me to check in on his pet. When I went into his house, I couldn't find any animals. I searched all over, and finally gave up and called him. I asked him what type of pet he had. His response? "My pet rock, Stubby." That's right, I just spent some time looking for a rock. FML
Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML
Today, my girlfriend dumped me because I didn't take her pet rock seriously. FML
Today, I bought a new Siamese Fighting Fish. I was so happy with my new fish so I bought him an expensive lovely bowl, some weeds, and a toy for the bowl. I left the room to get the fish food. When I returned, the fish was gone, and the cat was sitting on the table. FML
Today, I excitedly showed my new roommate my pet fish. She then told me about how she purposely starved her last fish to see how long it would take before they started eating each other before starving to death. FML
Today, while doing some spring cleaning, I found the remains of my goldfish, which I was sure my cat ate last year. FML
Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML
Today, I spent almost two hours cleaning my fish tank, only to find out that my cat had secretly eaten all of my fish while I was cleaning the tank. FML
Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML
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Top comments
ARSCON 15
What about a pet rock?
SubparAtBest 23
Are you sure they're stupid? Maybe they're just stoned. Maybe it seemed like a solid plan at the time and now he's just hit rock bottom.
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Comments (89)
guesswhatlifesux 14
For future reference, we muzzled our dog who ate rocks until she learned
writerchic85 26
Maybe the rocks around your place are tasty. You should try one and find out.
One_In_Three 24
My fish always do that but spit the rocks out afterwards.
worldclassrager 41
Get a cat...they can take care of themselves...
One_In_Three 24
Until they get hit by a car.
LyricaSilvan 30
You still have to give them food, brush them, take them to the vet if they get sick, clean the litter box...cats are a lot of work, actually. Especially if you have one that likes attention.
Queen_of_Night 20
#45- My house is remarkably truck free but I'm sure one will break free just to mow down my indoor cats.
One_In_Three 24
Most people who say that cats are more independent than other pets don't keep them safe indoors.
dtut 15
Atleast it won't float to the top when it dies.
wmayrhofer 18
The fish food may end up coating the rocks and voilà! Dinner
Mariszka67 2
They do that to get the algae off the rocks
missymaster 16
It's cleaning the rocks. They do that. Maybe research your pets needs before you get it.
anarchymaniac 22
How about just not having pets??
OSUBuckeyeChick 10
totally normal. I had a fish that moved the gravel all to one side of the tank and then to the other.