Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, just as I was about to orgasm, my boyfriend whispered, "Cum, my preciousssss" into my ear, in his scarily accurate Gollum voice. I think my clitoris just about withered away in despair. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were making love. I was really close to climaxing, when he suddenly stopped, smirked, and said, "Hang on, I'm buffering." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered, "Cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. Just as he was about to finish, he pulled out and came in his hand. He then flicked his hand towards my face and yelled, "Sha-ZAM!" FML
Today, the guy I'm seeing and I were having sex. While I was having my orgasm, he looked at me and said "SHHHH!". FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. As soon as I began to climax, he started repeatedly asking, "Are you done? Are you done yet? Are you done?" Well, NOW I am. Thanks, honey. FML
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Top comments
Serisent 26
Well, you know what Yoda says: Do or do not, there is no try. Clearly, you did not.
Darkcamzy 10
Doesn't Yoda just have the sexiest voice you have ever heard?
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Comments (112)
jonnyb_118 6
he's a square
MakinMills 12
lmao. gotta love yoda.
MDTeddy 13
Star Wars is cool, but I wouldnkt have said that till after Op had the ******.
bexxiiee 11
Lighten up, jeez.
amifaiyaz 12
lesson learned - never tell your partner when you're close to ******.
patrickalamo 48
Time to date a man
reflexion213 11
As a Star Wars fan, that's still weird.
joethebiden 8
How he ever got to be with a woman to begin with is a goddamn mystery.
MadRatBird 1
Hahaaaah. That's fantastic. He's a keeper! You'll look back on this one day and giggle your head off. Cherish these awkward, funny, ******-ruining moments. They may not last forever.
onesexytan 2
That's awesome lol