Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my boyfriend compared my orgasm to that of a beached sea turtle. He demonstrated what he meant in front of all our friends. FML
Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in The Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML
Today, after we had sex, my boyfriend told me how my orgasms used to make him think I was having a seizure. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend, and I told him I was close to having an orgasm. He smirked and started talking like Yoda, saying, "Strong with the cum, this one is." Orgasm gone. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML
Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an urge to sneeze. FML
Today, what my friends call my "resting bitch face" freaked my boyfriend out enough during sex that he went soft inside me. FML
Today, while losing my virginity to my boyfriend, I had my first orgasm. I don't remember much of what I said during, but after it was all over, he looks at me and says, "You have terrible grammar during climax." FML
Today, after faking my orgasms for several years, I found out that my boyfriend has been telling his friends that I'm super loose because he doesn't feel anything when I'm cumming. FML
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Top comments
theonex17 15
Tell his friends that you faked it and see how he feels after that
torio123 27
doesn't matter had sex...?
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Comments (64)
torio123 27
doesn't matter had sex...?
Dracoboxer357 36
Kinda does matter, and if he can't enjoy sex with Op because of That, then perhaps a dry spell reminder that her intimacy is a privilege, not a right, is in order. :p
XxDevilxXGt 26
Time to look up a camel having a stroke?
incoherentrmblr 22
Guess what day it is... Stroke DaYYYYYY!!!...
theonex17 15
Tell his friends that you faked it and see how he feels after that
flufee2 27
Thats hot
kittenchaser 5
how about no
greeneyebeauty9 28
Camels scare me in general. Have you ever seen the inside of their mouth? Scariest thing ever..
TheCrispyCat 20
...why are you looking inside camels' mouths?
greeneyebeauty9 28
It's not like I tried to look in its mouth. My friend had showed me a picture of a camel yawning & pointed out how creepy it was.
WhatsOpTic 11
Crispy...your picture......I can't exactly understand why
kittenchaser 5
After these kind of fml im starting to think I should hide my face, when I'll have sex.
Dracoboxer357 36
4- Nah, don't hide it, embrace it! Personally, the last thing I'm doing during sex is looking to critique my partner's O-face, as I'm a little distracted in the moment. ;P But if that's really a serious concern for you, either dim the lights, or practice in front of a mirror or something. I vote for not giving a shit, but to each their own. ;P
kittenchaser 5
well I have kind of low self esteem so im scared I will look creepy as **** xD and to fap in front of a mirror..? uhm. I don't know..
vassal44 9
Judging by your picture, you have nothing to worry about; you're gorgeous
6FootUnder 11
Lol your 15, sex should be the last thing on your mind right now.
hare 19
Was it at least hump day
thebiglloydtree 12
Sounds like a keeper, OP
meepmerp 20
Just shut it
FloMarDee 19
next ****** will be with another partner GUARANTEED
mya55 11
Well that's a bit harsh, don't you think? Nothing that can't be talked over. . .
speakersboom 19
Camels don't talk.
ViviMage 40
Please tell that twit that his sex life is private! And yours is too!!
buckdharma 38
I think that would make him a camel jockey.
BFons 19
At least you came.