Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
Today, I fell and sprained my ankle while trying to step into my underwear. FML
Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
Today, at physical therapy, even though I was wearing underwear, when I went on the leg press machine, my balls popped out of the bottom of my shorts. A bunch of times. The therapist saw. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML
Today, my wife tried to be sexy by climbing on top of me wearing nothing but a thong. Unfortunately, her knee came down in just the wrong spot and I passed out instantly from the pain of my testicle rupturing. I'm in hospital now recovering from the removal surgery. FML
Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML
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Top comments
bigpappy7 5
So...uh...how did you manage that?
inner_peace 19
Just reading that made me cringe.
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Comments (145)
LissaMccracken 23
This is one of those things you read about, and can feel the persons pain while reading... :(
ostfaiz 18
aaaah...are you nuts OP
nardledangers 5
Aw nuts.... seems like you really went balls to the wall on this one, but be careful or your really gonna get sacked with a bigger bill. in all seriousness, i have a sympathy ache in my testicles from this story.
bad_luck3 15
That is kinda funny, like how does someone do that?
SmoothPancakes 10
Funny my ass! My nuts are hurting just reading what OP went through. I don't even want to imagine the pain of actually experiencing that!
Respect101 17
In all fairness this is her first comment. but still it's not funny if it involves a man's junk being injured. Even if it is a little funny usually any man who witnesses it has sympathy ball pain which sucks.
buckstop1 37
Wow, that sucks OP. Hope the pain is gone soon
hayleybaaby 15
I actually cringed while reading this, because of how painful it sounds. I hope you feel better, OP!
NotDarkKnight 27
Every man's worst nightmare.
randomgalzbo 17
How the actual ****?? O_o
vintage_doll_89 8
Testicular torsion is actually pretty common among athletes. Obviously I've never been unfortunate enough to suffer what I can only imagine to be the most horrid pain a man can feel, but I've heard it's like satan himself is twisting the goods off. Hope you're alright.. Hey what were you doing?.
cdalton 12
ouch bro. I feel ya.