sneaky1324
Calgary, Canada
Today, I woke up by inhaling a fly up my nose, and feeling it twitching and slowly dying inside my nasal cavity. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
WTFLY
Hilo, United States
Today, a small fly flew straight up into my nose. I spent 10 minutes trying to blow/scratch/pick it out to no avail. I can still feel it moving. FML
baugy
Orlando, United States
Today, while outside, a bug flew up my nose. After I told my family and friends about a faint vibrating in my upper nostril, they all convinced me I was paranoid. That was until that night when I blew my nose and there was the bug in my tissue. Its leg was still twitching. FML
Anonymous
Snug as a bug…
Today, my nose had been feeling weirdly uncomfortable all day. After I got home, I blew my nose really hard. I found that a bug had been resting inside my nose the entire time. FML
bugnose
Gotcha
Today, I noticed an extremely large bug buzzing around my room. After several attempts, I stomped on it with my shoe. I was trying to get a closer look at my victory when it flew into my nostril. Turns out it was just playing dead. FML
Xandriajoy10
Australia
Today, a fly flew into my ear canal and got stuck. It was the most horrifying two minutes of my life. FML
laurenmichela
United Kingdom
Today, I coughed so much I threw up, then whilst recovering from throwing up, a fly flew into my mouth and I ate it. I then promptly threw up again. FML
jamblasticus
United States
Ewwww
Today, I was walking in the park when I saw an attractive girl walking nearby. I approached her to strike up a conversation when suddenly a large fly invaded my left nostril, and became lodged inside. After picking out the bloody fly pieces, I looked up to see the girl walking away, gagging. FML
liilii
Trivandrum, India
Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML
jaqlove
Clementon, United States
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Shinobi_3
United States
Today, while I was eating, a fly kept pissing me off. After three minutes of it buzzing around, I caught it and killed it. Then, without realizing it, I smeared its guts all over the front of my shirt. FML
Top comments
deedeee 9
Hopefully it didn't lay any eggs in there...
DocBastard 40
That's gnatsty, but snot the worst thing I've heard.
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Comments (172)
deedeee 9
Hopefully it didn't lay any eggs in there...
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Hopefully OP will get it all out, including all the bits.
maemadness 2
Don't scare the OP!
TourettesGuyFTW 26
20, I'm afraid that ship has probably already sailed...
lmfao1643 3
The eggs will hatch and the fly larva will eat op's brain
saintsrocksocks 10
28- I do not think that is possible. I may be wrong tho. Please enlighten me.
Pelvispresley 8
Use a Neti pot to get it out, op
p3mguin 7
Neti pots are amazing, especially with a stuffed up nose. Omg it's live heaven after all the pain you have to endure when water and solution is running through your nose.
Meettitan 14
Yeah it's gross when something that appears larger than your entire sinus comes flushing out though.... relieving, but disgusting.
Turtle_rebellion 10
44-yes, I believe it's VERY possible for maggots to eat a human brain.
slurshies 11
28- not trying to be a smartass here, but maggots only eat decaying flesh, so unless you're dead, maggots will not eat your brain.
Meettitan 14
94 is correct. We would --and still do, in fact-- use maggots in serious infection or burn cases. The maggots will clean the wound of decaying tissue, while leaving the living stuff in tact. Gross, but true!
RawEndo 1
A party up in there
saintsrocksocks 10
94-100 of that is true, why did I get downthumbed to hell. I completely agree.
sens3sfailing 25
This is a true question so would some one please tell me the answer with no smart ass comments calling me stupid? Are maggots the baby form of flies? I thought they were completely separate and that flies were larva then flies, not maggots. Or are there a certain species of fly that goes through the maggot stage where it eats the dead flesh?
Meettitan 14
Saints, you lacked confidence; your statement was also more of a question.
herecomestheFMLs 12
I would invest in some fly tape, to insure this doesn't happen again op. Also a paper bag to throw up in.
_Oblivion_ 12
Snot rocket that ******
5Cali5kid9 0
Hey
RaggleFrock 13
What did the old lady do after swallowing a fly? Go catch a spider!
gingerwithsoul_fml 6
Good luck getting to sleep tonight...
AphyTheBronette 15
138 - "Hay is for horses I'll feed ya later "
yumyumpoptart 16
that's just nasty
xlord 27
Thank you for clearing that up for me. I thought it would've been sweet.
Pelvispresley 8
Cleveland voice!
beatlegirl27 20
No shit Sherlock
akg98 13
Lol 47
beatlegirl27 20
With_Love929 3
Ew that's discusting why didn't you get a tissue and try to blow it out?
SarcasticUnicorn 9
Disgusting*
With_Love929 3
*disgusting, i apoligize
flutter4 7
I feel like I need to blow my nose now
DocBastard 40
apologize* or apologise* (if you prefer the queen's English)
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Queen's* - have some respect. ;)
DocBastard 40
You only capitalise "queen" if you're referring to a specific queen or calling her by name. Like Queen Sirin.
xXHollowIchigoXx 17
Capitalize*
Meettitan 14
38- look at docs previous post. He obviously knows which words to use, and where to use them. I suggest jumping off the thread before he comes back...
ineslovescats 5
36 spelled it right... It's the English way of spelling it not the American one.
xXUND3ADcityXx 0
56- Look* Doc's* =D
Inheritance 10
Wouldn't it be queens' since you're talking about one?
ebonyirony 29
89- the queens English refers to, basically, most of them. It doesn't belong to Queen Elizabeth or Victoria. It's the English of the current queen.
PaulB123 11
88 has a compelling argument, though he didn't do a great job of carrying it out. If Doc was talking about a specific queen, he should've capitalised the 'q'... As Doc himself said. However, if he was talking about all queens in general, or a group of queens such as 'all queens of England', he should've put " queens' ".
DocBastard 40
Hm...I shall have to consider this. Maybe I should have just said "British English" instead. :)
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Doc, it is the Queen's English. She owns it. She asks - why the hell you lot butchered words like aluminium, oregano and route.
DocBastard 40
Tourette's - You lot?
crakzila 4
Wouldn't it be queens' then? Showing possession in a generalized group? I never really liked writing English too much. They're too many rules for grammar and also many exceptions to those rules.
crakzila 4
Ha my phone didn't load the rest of this conversation. Happy to know my assumption was correct ;)
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Doc- which side of the Atlantic ocean are you?
DocBastard 40
Tourette - Who said I'm near the Atlantic? ;)
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Well where then!?
number103 5
Lol that's nasty :P
briancallahan 3
*Cleveland's voice*
MissMae93 23
4 - Clearly you didn't read 2's post before commenting.
ezmerelda2272 0
Agreed! Ewwww
OhDearBetrayal 25
56-They were written in about the same time. I doubt he refreshes his page every second to see if another person commented before posting his own.
Mearemoi 14
Reminds me of that story where a woman had a spider stuck in her ear for 5 days. Disgusting.
MindFreakazoid 10
Thanks for reminding me. I appreciated that.
SammyS2012 21
I completely forgot about that story... And now I've been reminded of it -__-
koolkat27 13
Or the time the person looked at the toilet paper after he wiped and saw a spider.. Yuck :(
Schizomaniac 24
Don't be such a buzz kill, OP. Haaaaaa I hate my life.
SilverKeith 7
Amazing.
amandajlucas2015 2
Ur kind of just slightly depressing
305Miami 0
Well, I can't say thats happened to me before.
MissMae93 23
I would assume this hasn't happened to about 90% of the general population.
AussieChild 22
Actually, studies show that the average person consumes 8-12 insects in their sleep, every year :/
kittytub 12
omnomnomnom. extra protein.
DocBastard 40
That's gnatsty, but snot the worst thing I've heard.
With_Love929 3
I see what you did thar. Hahaha.
flutter4 7
We all do :)
alshygirl 14
It took me five minutes to work out the pronunciation of gnatsty hahaha
MissMae93 23
29 - Really? It took you 5 full minutes to pronounce it? Yikes. I wonder how long it will take you to pronounce "pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis".
trippythehippy 6
You think it's funny, but itsnot
MsConfusedd 27
Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanokoniosis is a lung disease caused by silico dust! (calm down, no need to try and type it into google)
DocBastard 40
It's actually a word invented by a word puzzle writer for a competition. The actual medical term is "silicosis", which is not as sexy a word.
laxforevrr 0
hahahahhaha:)
alshygirl 14
51- took about two seconds
XtraEzeee 8
118- I can't even read that word in two seconds, let alone pronounce it.
saintsrocksocks 10
118, you are full of shit.
likeAwesome 3
Delicious...
Outnuendo 8
So did you keep it in your nose to use as a possible projectile later?