Today, I accidentally twisted my balls in my own underwear so badly that I had to be hospitalized. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML
Today, I fell and sprained my ankle while trying to step into my underwear. FML
Today, I fell asleep with my hands down my pants. I woke up to an excruciating pain coming from my genitalea. It turns out that I was having nightmares and I squeezed my balls because I was so terrified. I popped 3 blood vessels in my scrotum and now walk with a limp. FML
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
Today, at physical therapy, even though I was wearing underwear, when I went on the leg press machine, my balls popped out of the bottom of my shorts. A bunch of times. The therapist saw. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML
Today, my wife tried to be sexy by climbing on top of me wearing nothing but a thong. Unfortunately, her knee came down in just the wrong spot and I passed out instantly from the pain of my testicle rupturing. I'm in hospital now recovering from the removal surgery. FML
Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML
Today, my wife left her curling iron on the bed, which was dangerous enough, but I also accidentally sat on it after my shower. Now I have a burn on the bottom of my balls, which has turned into a painful blister. FML
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Top comments
bigpappy7 5
So...uh...how did you manage that?
inner_peace 19
Just reading that made me cringe.
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Comments (145)
ofernando84 4
You sir have long balls
Drake_The_Dragon 23
"Accidentally".....
l4urenz 23
Uhhh...
sirdano 3
That's one way to get the high notes when you sing
schober60 13
Testicular torsion - I've been there bud, I was in so much pain I hallucinated
Aye_itsvincent 1
It's called testicular contortion and is commonly in boxers yet is a decreased chance by 65% in briefs
thehieser 4
I guess u can say.... don't get ur nuts in A twist
SexyMexi21 23
and how did you manage that?
thenamesjan 13
...how..
Askim_fml 6
Who does that?!