Leave me out of this
Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving, she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver spat into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML
Today, my mom was driving me somewhere. As we were driving, she got mad at a motorcycle driver telling to "get the fuck off the road." In response, the driver spat into my open window. His spit landed on my face. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML
Today, I was riding my motorcycle when a guy cut me off at a light. I honked and swore at him when a bug flew into my mouth. FML
Today, I stopped at a light when someone crashed into my motorcycle, making me fall. The guy claimed it was my fault because I'd stopped too fast. I got really mad, so I attempted to spit on his face and was ready to start a fight when I noticed that I'd forgotten to lift the helmet visor. FML
Today, it was nice out, so I drove with my car windows down. I was stopped trying to turn onto a busy highway, when a car turned off the highway right next to me, hit a pothole, and splashed dirty water into my window and into my open mouth. FML
Today, I was riding my motorcycle when I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. Out of anger, I spat my gum at her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into some bushes. FML
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML
Today, I drove my mom home from the salon because she was feeling sick. I'm not the best driver, but I was excited that I was helping. Everything was going smoothly until I hit a bump in the road. My mom blew chunks all over. I found out very quickly that she had spicy chicken for lunch. FML
Today, while driving during rush hour, I was singing so loudly that some jackass in the car next to me felt he should get my attention by throwing a wadded-up McDonald's bag through my open window, hitting me in the face with it, and telling me to shut up. FML
Today, I was driving to work when I was almost hit by a teenage driver. I gave her the finger and shouted "F*** you!" making sure that she heard me. I then saw my boss glaring at me from the passenger seat. FML
Today, I was driving home on the highway with my wife and her parents. As I overtook another car, a rock got kicked up into our windshield. My wife screamed about the crack it created, while my mother-in-law goaded her on and mocked my "piss-poor driving." FML
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Top comments
MrJentipede 2
At least your mouth wasn't open.
herby123 0
relay it to ur mom?
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Comments (91)
Ohnoitslindsay 0
#60- it is the biker's fault 100% of the time. They are the ones who put themselves on a vehicle that provides no protection and would risk their death in the case of a common fender bender. #59- the situation that you just described clearly illustrates why motorcyclists should have no rights to the road.
PotatoBlankey39 2
#65 You obviously have no clue.... It's not a biker's fault 100% of the time. You've never been on a bike before have you? You don't know the freedom it provides, or the pure sense of calmness that it can put over a person. You offended me and I'm pretty sure you offended other riders. Don't go near any bikers or your ass will get a well deserved beating. People like you need to learn to be less arrogant and share the road. Stop being a ******* dick you asshole. Not all bikers are dumbass's and some even do a lot of good for the world; i.e. starting charities for disabled children. Stop paying attention to the damn stereotype and educate yourself you moron.
mandalaine05 0
I think that we need to define a motorcycle from a crotch rocket. A motorcycle, to me, is like a Harley Davidson and others like it. In my opinion, crotch rocket is ridden for it's speed, that is kinda what they're built for. I've known motorcyclists my whole life, and they're more interested in the camaraderie of the sport than whose bike is faster. I believe that people who own crotch rockets, are a little bit more irresponsible when they're driving. I've seen people go twice as fast as most traffic on crotch rockers. I've never seen a motorcyclists go more than 10 miles over the speed limit. I don't believe that bikers are irresponsible. I am, however, afraid to drive behind a biker, cuz you never know, something might happen, and I just don't want to run over the biker if he/she falls off, or wrecks right in front of me, I would feel much safer if I ran into the back of a car/truck than the back of a motorcyclist.
Madman85 0
That's when you should have stopped and kicked his ass. Swearing and gesturing is one thing but spitting is a whole new level.
blitzer_tidus 0
#67 - it's people like you who make me feel better on the road. Awareness/being informed are things that help every motorcyclist. I believe the biker in this case was probably someone on a crotch rocket, that's not saying that the OP's mother didn't deserve it (sorry you got spit on btw), but still. Those who think motorcycles should be made illegal are simply ignorant, or perhaps they've lost someone due to a wreck. That doesn't mean you should deprive those that love it of the privilege to ride. As it's been said, the freedom/calmness it provides is something unparalleled, at least for me. Sorry OP'er. FYL.
ShoShenron 0
Him spitting on your face was your cue to yell out "Get the **** off the road"
ladywaldo 0
How nice!
musu_fml 0
#65, I'm a motorcyclist, and commute on it every day. My bike is a workhorse, not a shiny toy that gets cleaned more often than it gets ridden. I'm a skilled rider, and a cautious rider. I assume every other road user is an idiot until they prove otherwise, because the consequences of an accident are a lot more severe and painful for me than it would be for a car driver. Us bikers have chosen a vehicle that offers very little crash protection compared to other road users, but arguably so does anyone driving a car more than ten years old. This vulnerability, by the by, tends to push bikers towards being the best drivers on the road; because there are only two kinds of bikers that exist; good ones, and dead ones, and the dead ones don't tend to be driving around causing accidents. I have avoided numerous accidents because of the way I ride; and in 100% of cases in my experience, these incidents have all been caused by the innattention of drivers of four-wheeled vehicles. We don't know who was driving/riding badly in this story. It could have been the mother. It could have been the biker. Either way, I can forgive the biker for getting angry more than I can forgive the mother; the biker has a lot more to lose than just property damage in the form of a dented car if an accident occurs (again, the rider's fault you might say; but I point again to the masses of other road users who don't have the protection of a modern, safety-engineered car), so you can see why they might be upset in an altercation, especially if they (rightly or wrongly) don['t think they're to blame, and the other party is screaming expletive-laced abuse at them.
fuckzombies 0
Hmmm lick it up
PotatoBlankey39 2
#65 I can respect what you said. I've lost close friends from the ignorance of other drives. Whether the woman in the car is talking on her phone with screaming children in the back, and doesn't look when she pulls out or the man that claims "the biker came out of nowhere," and killed the biker when he should've heard the bike. Safer drivers are needed. On both ends and I'm glad you're stepping it up on your part as a rider. #67 Your right. The definition of a motorcycle and a crotch rocket need to be defined. I know some bikers that think they are pretty bad ass but they know how to ride safely and aren't stupid enough to try anything that could possibly get themselves killed. They are safe riders. I've found individuals that ride crotch rockets are a little more ruthless in their safety procedures on the road. They tend to drive faster, have quicker tempers, and appear to think they own the road. I know NOT ALL crotch rocket riders are like that, but there are a few I've come in contact with that are. Thank you for taking the time to define the two! Much appreciated. ^_^