Today, I walked my girlfriend home. As I kissed her goodbye, I heard a high-pitched scream and turned just in time to see her little brother charge head-first into my nuts. All because I kissed her on the cheek. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was in school when I spotted my girlfriend in the hallway. I wanted to be all romantic and grab her like guys do in movies. I grabbed her wrist forcefully and pulled her out of the crowd. As I quickly leaned in to kiss her, I broke her nose. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I was going on a date with my girlfriend. When I took her home, her sister came to the door. I used to date her sister and I didn't know they were related. My girlfriend realized this, then kicked me in the crotch. FML
Today, I leaned over my sleeping girlfriend, kissed her cheek and told her I love her. She punched me in the ear. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I was making out with a girl I've liked for a long time. At one point she stopped kissing me and said, "You kiss like my brother". I sat there dumbstruck as she went back to kissing me. FML
Today, I went to drop my little brother off at the nursery. As I walked in, a boy punched me in the dick and ran away. FML
Today, while walking through the park, a little boy came running up to me and hit me in the nuts with a stick. I fell on the ground and looked up just in time to see his mom giving him the thumbs up with a smile on her face. FML
Today, I snuck up on my girlfriend to give her a kiss. Only after I planted a big one did I realize it was not my girlfriend, or even a girl for that matter. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
Exactly which cheek did you kiss? Because that makes all the difference.
BionicIce 9
I would have slapped that kid
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Comments (76)
xkbz510 13
honestly its okay. you should respect that maybe her younger brother is caring for her sister since he doesnt know you yet.
TommyGunGO 10
Ive been dating her for 4 months ... Ive met her brother many different times ... Maybe every 2/4 weekends in a month since we've met which was 7 months ago.
JosephKorso 15
Is he still young enough to thing girls are icky? He might be trying to save you.
Arot6 17
Even if he's a little kid, he should know full well that attacking people is wrong. You can overlook a kid breaking a vase, but it's not ok to just accept when they actually try to hurt someone.
Hildy93 21
Wow what a real ball buster
TheLostCauseFML 40
I totally just saw that play out in my head in Anime. And it was awesome. Sorry about your nuts though, OP!
SleepyPharma 21
That was an epic scene in my mind already. imagining it in amine style enhanced it 200%. Thank you.
cheyennekennedy 15
poor dude
zarrganaut 17
Gotta love protective little brothers. The first time my boyfriend visited, my brother slapped him in the face. Kinda forget why.. Haha. Sorry that happened to you op!
fleur_de_fevrier_fml 23
I wonder why you think it's ok for your brother to assault someone he does not know just because he is with you. Does this mean your little brother gets to decide who you hang out with? Also would you have the same attitude, if it was the other way around?
Amuseic 3
I think her little brother might be jealous of you that his sister now spends more time with you and not him. I don't think he was trying to protect OP's girlfriend, I mean since when do little kids consider a kiss on the cheek "wrong"?
TommyGunGO 10
I see him and probably hangout with him almost every time we are together if not every time.
Amuseic 3
Lets hope he'll get used to it then... Anyway, I hope you've recovered now.:)
ArinHardie8 6
This is why I wear a cup everywhere
idk_rose 25
FYL. But the kid just thought he was protecting his sister, which is sweet. I hope you didn't vomit OP.
TommyGunGO 10
No vomit i did end up passing out for about 10 mins on her driveway.
DoomedGemini 38
It's REALLY not sweet to ATTACK someone. Especially over something so trivial.
DoomedGemini 38
So cute he's willing to assault someone because he can't handle his sister having her own life and making decisions
vdog117 11
punt the lilmfer like a football