Today, I asked my dad to please shave his awful beard, because I'm a laughing-stock at school for being picked up each day by a guy whose face looks like Bigfoot's ass. He agreed, and 10 minutes later was sporting a pedo-stache. It's going to be a long year. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I noticed that my facial hair had grown by an acceptable amount. I spoke to my Dad and decided to show him, thinking he would approve of my manliness. His exact words when I showed him were, "Nah, son. You just look like a lesbian." FML
Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML
Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML
Today, my mom told me that I need to shave my beard because it's getting too long. This wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for the fact that I'm a woman. FML
Today, I found out what people really think about the beard I've been proudly growing for over a month. It appears that my face now looks like an unshaven ballsack. FML
Today, I had to beg my husband not to shave his pubic hair into a handlebar moustache. FML
Today, I went to pick up my daughter from my dad's house. He'd shaved her head bald. "For a laugh." FML
Today, I had to meet my mother. Being a college student, I decided I was too lazy to shave this morning. She noticed the stubble on my face, and started crying because I'm growing up. I'm 23 years-old. My dad yelled at me for making my mom cry. FML
Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML
Today, four days after making a $100 bet with my balding, pedo-stache wearing dad over who could get a girlfriend first, he came home and introduced me to his new girlfriend. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
unidentifieduser 23
Your dad is parenting the right way.
RustlingSoul 26
Is your dad screwing with you? If so, your dad's awesome!
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (133)
FelixJC 14
At least your dad cares enough to pick you up from school and even enough to change his own appearance for you. Stop caring so much about what others think and just be glad he's there for you.
Ihavegas 22
theres a name for guys without beards, its called a woman
KaylaTackett 18
Beards are awesome!
keithsbooty 20
You should take pride in having a dad who's willing to pick you up every day. You shouldn't care about what other people think of him.
RebeccaRFT 18
You so deserved this. Way to be nice to your dad and show him you don't care what people think of your father.
feven 32
At least it wasn't a hitler mustache
martin8337 36
Pedo: short for pedophiles. Also Spanish for fart. Maybe he is sporting a fart-stache.
Eddy1006 4
Pornstache
alexandrarae 13
It's too bad you didn't inherit your dads awesome sense of humour.
ekim300 26
Come on OP, are you in elementary school? Who cares what your parents look like? Don't ask them to change who they are just to fit in a social group. Props to your dad for his awesome sense of humour and agreeing to shaving just cause you asked.