Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while I was at my girlfriend's parents' house for dinner, and I thought no one was looking, I picked my nose and put it underneath my chair. Turns out she has a little brother who found it appropriate to point at me and scream, "Booger monster, Booger monster!" FML
Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML
Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML
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Top comments
nicola1233 0
f your dogs life
Snow_Daisy 7
gross!
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Comments (219)
jazzyjas130 0
eww gag.
awesome576 0
ok that's is so ****** GROSSSSSSS EWWW
YunqFlyMa21o 0
ew thats ****** nastyyy.!
perdix 31
Anyone ever seen what a dog does around a cat's litter box? Boogers ain't nuthin'!
ScreamToday 0
Lol, I had a black Shar Pai, and every time he'd go get some "Kitty Box Crunchies" as we called them in my house, he'd always have specks of litter all over his nose to give him away.
perdix 31
I remember the time when my dog sampled had a "Kitty Tootsie Roll" and then licked my face. Ugh! Good thing that was about 20 years ago!
FortunateSon 0
That's too funny~! (As long as he doesn't hunt you down for "Daddy kisses" after getting frenzied up by the trick or treat session your GF just gave him~!) EW~!
omey123 0
This is a horrible fml to read after eating.....
danaynay 0
....WHAT A KEEPER!! ._.
saranottelling 7
She sounds like a classy gal!
queenofdeath 0
and you have the gutts to call her "your girlfriend" ? Gosh.
smoochiepooh213 0
Lmfao, thats so funny!