Today, I found out that my girlfriend feeds her boogers to our dog. Sometimes she even makes her do tricks for them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out my girlfriend has been putting boogers in my belly button when I don't pay attention to her while we watch tv. FML
Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while I was at my girlfriend's parents' house for dinner, and I thought no one was looking, I picked my nose and put it underneath my chair. Turns out she has a little brother who found it appropriate to point at me and scream, "Booger monster, Booger monster!" FML
Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
Today, I found out that my new girlfriend breastfeeds her dolls. FML
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, I watched in horror from the other room as my boyfriend picked the biggest, slimiest booger I've ever seen, then lowered it into his mouth, and licked his finger clean. I very nearly threw up. FML
Today, I found dog poop in my room that had probably been there for days. My girlfriend, who was watching the house, said she didn't realize it was there, because she thought it was the smell of her own farts. FML
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend was a kid, she enjoyed torturing animals for fun. Nice to know she was lying when she said the idea of harming an animal “makes her sick to her stomach.” FML
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Top comments
nicola1233 0
f your dogs life
Snow_Daisy 7
gross!
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Comments (219)
Volleybabe24 0
that's seriously messed up! how old is your girlfriend??
Craw25 0
You sure did pick a winner
jillz 0
Look if you're that envious of the dog and feeling left out, just tell her. I'm sure she'll hook you up with some too. mm yummy! Kidding. She's gross. LoL She might be using your scissors to clip her toenails. Are you sure she's not a man? :p
KerimcanKJGoren 0
lol
tastycakes 0
Yeah it's gross, but pretty funny! And it won't do the dog any harm. Anyone who's ever had a dog will know that they lick their own asses and eat/roll in/ lick all kinds of crap that they find in the street. And if the dog likes boogers enough that she'll do tricks for the boogers, then she can't exactly be suffering.
Cthulu 0
exactly my thoughts! Well stated!
offtheheezy 0
Dogs never cease to amaze me. Your girlfriend though, is one sick lady.
MJFG100 0
FYL for dating a girl who feeds her dog snot. That's just sick, man.
chino44 0
That So Crazy I do the same thing!
babybubz 0
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little.. ...does she cook for you?
Nic_hole 0
WTF that's cruel and sick >:/