Today, my girlfriend was giving me a handjob in the shower. As I was reaching climax, my mom walked by the bathroom door and started talking to me. My girlfriend didn't stop, and in order to distract from the situation at hand, I had to carry on the conversation with my mom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was getting a blowjob from my girlfriend in the shower, my mom stood outside the door the whole time, asking me about my day. My girlfriend never stopped going, and my mom, who was unaware that my girl was with me in the shower, is now getting me tested for speech impairment. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in the mood for something different. So we decided to have sex in the shower. When we were finished I heard a voice outside the door asking if we needed a towel. It was my mother. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was about to suck his dick when my mom walked in. FML
Today, the guy I like called me, and my mom picked up. Just as it happened, I slipped and fell in the shower, and was sitting there moaning. The guy asked if he could speak to me, but my mom heard me and answered, "Well, she's masturbating right now, but I'll tell her to call you later!" FML
Today, I was touching myself in my room. Just as I hit the climax, my mom walked in because she heard me making noises and thought I was having a nightmare. FML
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. My phone started ringing and it was my Mom, she said I could answer it. As I answered the phone my girlfriend started playing with my dick. I moaned. Loud. FML
Today, my mom tried to give me the sex talk, while I was mounting my boyfriend. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were heading back to her place. On the way there, she was rubbing and stroking me. When we got there, I asked her mom for a congrats hug. I forgot I had a hard on from my girlfriend. She felt it. FML
Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, dropped a condom on the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!" FML
Today, I was masturbating in my bedroom, when suddenly, my mom opened the door and walked in with guests. I didn't react quick enough. FML
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Top comments
guy_whos_sad 0
The situation........ *puts on cool glasses" ......at hand. YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Awkwarddd!!
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Comments (104)
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Awkwarddd!!
Blake92 0
Ahahha yeh at least your mum didn't walk in. Would have been beyonddd awkward innit
xBangOut 4
Gotta appreciate your gf in this situation, she didn't get distracted by your mom walking by means she is pretty adventurous so maybe in future u could afford to have some fun with her in more extreme situations.^.^
HomeAl0ne 20
Agree with xBangOut. Let her know you enjoyed the fact she didn't stop.
josh55 1
agree with 76 look at the bright side she kept going your girlfriend sounds like wifey material
cocobulla1 4
the situation at hand...haha punny
guy_whos_sad 0
The situation........ *puts on cool glasses" ......at hand. YYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH
JanisEvans 10
My thoughts exactly! :D
kingtz 6
op gets points for this pun!
MyNameIsBruce 0
That's exactly what I thought!!!
dcioth 0
exactly... pits on cool glasses ...what I was thinking YYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
TheNewGuy03 29
dammit, way to steal all of my words. i wonder if op intended it to sound that way...i bet he did. |the kid|
daAce77 8
that's hilarious
Gravitex 0
awwww yyeeaaaahhhhh
vono360 0
yeah beeeatch!!!!
chuckvargas 0
clever u almost got **** blocked by your own mom you should do the same thing to your mom when her and your dad are having sex
Chiyo_fml 0
"Her and your dad" Wouldn't the grandfather object to such a thing?
fatalkiss 0
hahaha ^ win.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
geez, SOMEone knows how to bring down the mood
drewgreenan 0
haha Harry potter freak you is ;) though this in just for ya. ^
jdude2913 0
why are pplcthumbing down this is hilarious as ling as *her* is the mom
I_iz_B_a_troll 24
Mama mia! How awkward D; At least youre getting some!(:
stealthkitten 3
haha, at least you're good at multitasking ;)
emodude44 0
I disagree.
wisericky 12
but im pretty sure OP's girlfriend has a one track mind.
ILike_Dancing123 19
Technically it kinda sounds like you got hard from talking to your mum :L gross!!
gamerhead 3
Pretty sure he already was, I would be.
dudehaha 4
he was already. do you need sex Ed?
RaidenEl 5
technically it kinda sounds like your stupid -.-"
debatingalways 0
123: win!
o76923 8
So your girlfriend is kinky? That isn't a bad thing.
BlackHoleSuns 0
******* idiots! The point of the FML is that he was carrying on a conversation with his mother while receiving a handjob. Not the best situation to be stuck in if you ask me. I'm sure it doesn't help that OP was about to climax before to conversation began.
BlackHoleSuns 0
******* idiots! The point of the FML is that he was carrying on a conversation with his mother while receiving a handjob. Not the best situation to be stuck in if you ask me. I'm sure it doesn't help that OP was about to climax before to conversation began.
mkrone 0
23 is the idiot. The point of this comment is to ignore the point of it.
atthegates 0
not an FML in the least. ur gettin ur dink stroked bud....time to look at that glass half full
stealthkitten 3
haha, Atleast you're
cguinn17 9
i agree!
cguinn17 9
/sarcasm...
dropdeaddafne 0
Haha xD
mddaily21 0
text me
sone14 0
lol nice one