Today, my boyfriend got a new rifle. He forced me to watch him stripping it, oiling it, and sliding things into its barrel. We then watched 'Enemy at the Gates'. I basically endured 4 hours of gun porn. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend got a raging boner while looking around at a gun store. He hasn't had any sexual interest in me in months. FML
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jacking it. He wouldn't continue and let me watch. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I had sex. He decided to make gun sound effects as he came. FML
Today, I was dragged by my dad to the gun range for his pipe dream of a competitive shooting team. Apparently, plinking away on .22s while he and his ex-military buddies compare guns and trade sci-fi war stories until 7 PM is more important than the two research papers I'd set aside to write. FML
Today, I slept with my boyfriend for the first time. I'd always imagined it would be a romantic moment, but it turned out that "Saw 5" was on the TV in the background, and the sex was so fantastically tragic that I ended up watching/listening to it, on the sly. FML
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided it was time to spice up our sex life. He now watches Sons Of Anarchy when we have sex. FML
Today, I sat through 9 gruelling hours of Star Wars with my boyfriend. I hate those movies with a passion and frankly would rather get a pap smear from Wolverine than watch them. Afterwards, he dumped me for yawning, saying that I didn’t take a “serious” interest in his favorite things. FML
Today, my girlfriend finally showed me the porn she likes to watch. Amputees were involved. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I watched Star Trek Into Darkness together. He liked it so much that he's now chosen to yell "KHAAANNNNN!" as he cums. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
You're just jealous that it wasn't you getting stripped, oiled and having things slid into your "barrel."
super3286 14
that's guntastic
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Comments (162)
billyXcore 0
My husband does the same to me. ALL the time! I feel for you OP. I rly do!
Kyakan 1
What you described (before the movie) just sounds like he cleaned the gun he just bought, which is a good idea to do, so why's that bad?
flamegrilled123 3
wtf guns are illegal in uk
kaceemae 7
"forced" you to sit there? why didn't you leave or go to anther room. it's not like he held you at gunpoint :p
JanisEvans 10
You could have walked away any time. And 'Enemy At The Gates" is an awesome movie.
Mokiikom_fml 8
#5 YDI to you. What for? Well, for having a crappy life where you feel miserable because you hate everybody who is different from you. Rabid anti-gunners would like to force other people to be like them, but guess what? Each person is different, and you hating something doesn't makes it right for you to use disgusting language against another human being just because they're different from you. Do you also walk up to cops and spit at them because they carry guns? No? Why then do you hate civilians who go through the whole training and permits etc. to legally own a gun? And athletes in shooting sports? And just plain any people who like target practice? You'd whine so much if people attacked you for something you enjoy that's perfectly innocent, but you think it's justified for you to do the same to others. That's called hypocrisy, you know?
Tahsis 4
58, 5 is a troll. You are just feeding him and sounding like a whiny bish. Please shut up.
UmbraeCatervae 0
i do that to my fiance too but shes learned alot and enjoys rifles and weapons now lol but im not Army. SemperFi
smartman136 8
get over it bitch. guns are awesome and if ur a femi-nazi, hillary supported just go die somewhere
Im_Jesus_BITCH 3
I also don't see the problem with cleaning a gun. I don't know much about guns, but I think that maintaining your gun like that helps prevent problems with it in the future. Like missfires or whatever they're called.