Today, my girlfriend finally showed me the porn she likes to watch. Amputees were involved. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML
Today, I finally convinced my girlfriend to let me play porn while we were getting busy. The girl in the video said, "You don't need a condom, you can just pull out." I noticed she had a caesarean scar and burst out laughing. My girlfriend stormed out before I could explain. FML
Today, my new girlfriend, with whom I have not had sex yet, showed me her collection of sex toys. She picked up one approximately the size of my forearm and said "This one is my favorite." Now I'm scared for her to see me naked. FML
Today, I watched my girlfriend slowly floss her teeth, and then eat what showed up on the floss. FML
Today, my mother found my sex toys. To make me "feel better" she showed me hers. FML
Today, I walked in on my porn addicted roommate watching a gynecology exam online. He asked me to watch it with him. FML
Today, my girlfriend of two years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML
Today, I found out that my girlfriend takes videos of me sleeping and watches them with her friends. FML
Today, I witnessed my girlfriend eat the dead skin from the soles of her feet. FML
Today, my friend sent me a link to a porn video. The guy in it was my boyfriend, the girl in it wasn't me, but they were in my bed. FML
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Top comments
JackWood 21
I'd give an arm and a leg for a woman like that!
cuz803 46
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! GET OUT THAT RELATIONSHIP ASAP!! CASTRATION IS ON HER LIST I GUARANTEE YOU!!
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Comments (3)
RichardPencil 32
Not the ones with Stumpy Blumpkins and Pegleg Meg? Um, my friend raves about them. Yeah, that's it.
poopface82 25
I don’t know who those people are. I think I was happier when I didn’t know.
GlennQugmire 14
Silly
cuz803 46
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! GET OUT THAT RELATIONSHIP ASAP!! CASTRATION IS ON HER LIST I GUARANTEE YOU!!
JackWood 21
I'd give an arm and a leg for a woman like that!
SirEnigM0nk 22
Would you give head too?