Today, thirty minutes after the end of a great date with a great girl, she texted me, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Feeling bad, I texted him a few hours later apologizing. He said it was fine and that he went ahead and picked up a girl from the mall. FML
Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend of two years expressing my feelings for her. She responded with, "I'm going to bed." FML
Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML
Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for another girl. This other girl helped me break up with her so we could date. After it was all done, she promptly rejected me and in front of everyone, saying how much of a douche I was for leaving my girlfriend for another girl. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML
Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. It's OK, though, she says we can still go on the vacation I planned next month for our 3 year anniversary, just "as friends." The tickets are non-refundable. FML
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Top comments
beaglegal 42
Sorry OP, but it doesn't sound like she's worth it. You will be better off without her. I hope you meet the right girl soon!
saidoh_fml 26
What the hell went wrong? Dating can be so confusing.
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Comments (114)
beaglegal 42
Sorry OP, but it doesn't sound like she's worth it. You will be better off without her. I hope you meet the right girl soon!
IloveToLaugh143 21
She doesn't sound that great to me. But it's all good OP, you just dodged a bullet.
daisylokes 16
thats not very nice... give her number out to party line as a payback, ahaha xD but really man, dont let that dumb twat upset you, im sure your a great guy :-) I hope you feel better, and just try to remember that other people's actions are never really a reflection of you, but rather a manifestation of whatever is going on inside them'
PresidentNorth 16
Oh man the love, I can just feel it building inside me. Thank you sister moon.
iBanana 17
There's a wonderful lady friend out there just waiting for you to find her, OP. Just keep throwing that line back in the water and eventually you'll catch a champion, prized fish. But dear holiness do not catch the crabs.
morella_xx 29
#25, how do you know she's a dumb twat? Maybe op's idea of a great date is spending the whole evening leering at her **** while he picks his nose and eats it.
saidoh_fml 26
What the hell went wrong? Dating can be so confusing.
712sash 26
True that. Last month, I was supposed to meet this girl at a cafe for a date (we met online). I got there first. She came in, saw me and left. Later, I got a text from her saying that she doesn't date guys who wear glasses. Also, her stache was thicker than mine. I was like, umm wut?
glabberfasted 16
Doesn't date guys with glasses? Wouldn't she have seen by your online photo(s) that you wear glasses? Sounds like a shitty fake excuse to me.
712sash 26
Most of my pics on that website were taken at clubs and I tend to wear contacts when I go out, but wear glasses on normal days. Anyway, I'm glad I dodged the bullet.
oddities 20
#2, tell me about it. My girlfriend can go from kissing me to ignoring me like that* and then back to square 1. Some girls should come with subtitles. *insert finger snap here
more4me 27
she probably remembered that she already has a boyfriend, or she got a better offer , or something along those lines.
Bano360 25
Women can be so confusing. But then again guys can be like that too. Also #35 maybe have a picture of yourself just casually at home on it too. It will save you the trouble of girls like that in the future.
Contradictional 5
Don't worry OP there will always be someone else that will like you for who you are! Keep your chin up!
SaintJupiter 16
That's brutal OP. You deserve better anyway. Chin up. There are more fish in the sea.
masterof1 7
But what if op is a complete dick or smells like pig farts?
isuckwithnames 22
You say it to his face or just say something, to his face, saying that she doesn't want to see him again. Preferably in a more polite, less bitchy way.
Welshite 40
Aww. She's using reverse psychology to get your attention and affection. Go after her, OP! Disclaimer: Not responsible for any restraining order that may occur.
illegalbeagle69 23
I followed your advice.. 3 restraining ord... Damn, didn't read the fine print.
Godsofdracos 15
If your picture is how you treated them, I'd get a restraining order too..
isuckwithnames 22
Instructions too confusing, got dick stuck in ceiling fan.
appletreee 30
It's gonna be okay OP you'll find someone that's better than her
Quackadoodledoo 13
Please give another example of your amazing powers. What am I going to have for breakfast tomorrow?
amayasoma 19
22 - Butter toast.
DaMann360 19
Not that bitch that's for sure
mydumblifesucks 20
That's so rude! On the bright side, you'll never have to deal with her again.
HeyTherexxx 21
She doesn't seem that great. You'll find someone better OP. Don't worry. :)
AviKerensky 17
The proper response here is, "Okay, you'll never see me again, but can you tell me what I did wrong so I never make that mistake again?"
isuckwithnames 22
Or **** you works too
PenguinBitch 44
@16 He shouldn't go down to her level of rudeness.
benjamins39 12
I've tried that one...usually all I hear is crickets
DaMann360 19
I cannot delete this message so I erased the original and wrote this in its place.
isuckwithnames 22
Actually I would say OP would still be less rude in that hypothetical situation.
BoltTheSuperdog 22
Maybe the text was meant for someone else?
ChristianH39 30
That's probably being a little too optimistic, unfortunately.
BoltTheSuperdog 22
Well, a dog can try.