Today, my family started their own version of the Hunger Games. With farts as their ammo, they've been tackling and gassing everyone until their victim "dies" by surrendering. My house is a flatulent war zone, and I fear waking up blind. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, I farted in front of my husband. It somehow turned into a farting war. Then I realized this is the closest we've come to intimacy in a week. FML
Today, I got to be an innocent victim caught in the middle of a farting war between my boyfriend and my 10-year-old son. I fear my sense of smell will never recover. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML
Today, I farted so loudly in bed and I woke up my husband. Startled, he thought that someone was entered in our room and fired a shot. FML
Today, my boyfriend decided to re-enact a scene from Family Guy. He locked me in the car with him and farted deadly ones repeatedly. He wouldn't let me out until I learned to "love the gas." FML
Today, my husband and my daughter engaged in a fart war. Guess who go to do a pile of shitty laundry, while the other texted his friends about the “hilarious” incident? FML
Today, I farted in a public pool and watched in horror as bubbles of death gas floated up beside my son who started calling me the fart monster in front of everyone. FML
Today, we had cabbage. A lot of cabbage. The farts are so horrid I can barely stand myself. FML
Today, in my sleep I let out a couple of farts. Normally this wouldn't be a big deal, but on this night I had slept in my mom's room. She came to check in on me and violently woke me up because she thought I pooped in the bed. Now my entire family knows I fart in my sleep. FML
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Top comments
kmccain 27
May the odds be ever in your favor
paulkeppel 0
gas them out until they surrender. show no mercy!
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Comments (163)
jem137451 0
At least if you win you never have to play I'n the games again.... Haha but sorry OP
jem137451 0
In- stupid word correct!
dessaye 19
There's always next year! Don't forget the Quarter Quell :P
Shelta957 13
That's only of she survives this round!! :P
jem137451 0
Ah, yes, hopefully they don't have katniss's bad luck by having to play again
Petey_Piie 1
I love OP's name. Be strong! District 12 victors have can-do attitudes! Fight back and you will win.
PurpleAddict 0
YOUR FAMILY IS AMAZING
guitarsonist666 0
What's the problem?? That's my house everyday!!
nabila21 0
I need to read that book .
ftw487 9
U should read them. theyre really goof
ftw487 9
Oops i ment good
soupisyummy 13
Reeeeeeaaaaadddd itttttttt!!!!! The whole series is.....jmdjcskxmsuxbskxidbchxjzk SEX!!
Melania890 9
Oh my god, please please please read them. It's got to be the best trilogy ever. :)
mynameispickle 0
Umm...what? At least your family is comfortable around eachother!
MickGold 8
BOMBS AWAY!!!
bananabuttercup 8
Sounds like you don't really know what the Hunger Games are.
mattisons19 7
Sounds a lot like my family xD
simplyunique907 4
wow