Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I witnessed my neighbor draining his sewage-clogged plumbing into my backyard. FML
Today, as I sat on the toilet, I heard a noise outside. I peered through the window and found myself staring directly at my neighbor. FML
Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML
Today, I had to call the cops on my neighbor. I was heading off to work when I saw him actually shitting in our yard. The reason? They caught my dumbass rebel of a son on their security camera, shitting in their yard. FML
Today, my drunk neighbor couldn’t get into his apartment and thought it would be a good idea to poop in our yard. He left a pile of diarrhea under our window, and poop-stained napkins all over the lawn. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML
Today, I caught my new neighbor sticking his knob inside my car and pissing on my seats. His reason? I parked in his spot. FML
Today, I saw a kid taking a dump next to my lawn. The good news: his mother picked up the poop to discard it. The bad news: she put it in my mailbox. I now have a pile of smelly brownish tissue-wrapped goo baking under the hot sun inside my mailbox. FML
Today, I woke up feeling great. I opened up the blinds and looked out from my window just in time to see a man ripping my mailbox from the ground and sprinting away with it. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML
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Top comments
zingline89 18
Would you prefer U Pee S?
mduffy08 8
Did you have any mail?
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Comments (207)
venomousddog 19
Did you tell him to piss off? Pun intended if anyone asks
imani132 6
And not a **** was given that day
Argenisjose 9
Like a BOSS!
Fylives101 2
You've got mail!
pexy_fml 16
Don't worry she is just marking her territory
saberthree 4
At least you know who pissed in your mailbox, you should take it up a notch and take a huge diarrhea shit in front of his door, and piss on his door handle to even things out
XtraEzeee 8
You can give yourself diarrhea at will? Very impressive indeed...
BrysGirl27 14
Maiilllll Callll haha:)
Rebekkah1993 10
Tomorrow walk onto your neighbors lawn..look them right in the eyes...and shit on his door step???
Dracoboxer357 36
89- I'm thinking if his/her neighbour is gutsy enough to piss on his mailbox while being stared at, he may not have a problem taking a swing at Op if he/she was taking a dump on his steps....and I don't know about you, but I would find it difficult to fight back with my pants down around my ankles. ;)
mosquito19 14
you should have take a picture of his noodle and post it craigslist
dohboi 2
Next time have a camera pointed at the mail box and YouTube that shit err pee