Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took out my phone and realized I butt dialed my girlfriend and left her a 4 minute voicemail of me farting in an echoing toilet bowl. FML
Today, in the middle of the night, I was punched in the face by my frightened girlfriend, who had just been awoken by her own fart. FML
Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Because she farted, and thought it was "too awkward". FML
Today, my girlfriend farted in her sleep, woke me up because it was so damn loud, and my room smelt like rotten noodles for about an hour. FML
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching tv when suddenly one of our phones start going off. We both have the same phone and they were next to each other. She picks up the phone and reads the text message, "I wish you were here! I'd fuck you silly" She gets pissed and runs out. It was her phone. FML
Today, my stomach growled so loud in class that a boy sitting next to me thought his phone had vibrated. FML
Today, I was woken up by my own fart. FML
Today, my girlfriend managed to trap a fart in her nightgown and carry it all the way from the bathroom, into our bedroom, and finally into our bed. FML
Today, I was woken up at 4 in the morning by my boyfriend farting on my leg and giggling in his sleep. For the third time. FML
Today, while naked, my fiancée said there was something wrong with her butt. She turned around and I leaned in to look at it. She then farted in my face. On purpose. FML
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Top comments
RusticChick 27
Sounds like love
briang959 47
Did you answer her call?
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Comments (83)
sullivankeara 25
Girls fart too
fooltemptress 36
She's definitely a keeper!
syed121417 22
I know people fart, you know people fart, we all know we all fart. C'mon OP. Sometimes you have to just let one rip. Be happy she's not one of those girls who think her boyfriend will think less of her if she farts in front of you and that she is comfortable with you. If anything, think that it's a sign that you can fart in front of her. It's like a stepping stone in a relationship in a way haha
GlitterScribbles 9
You don't have to do it on his leg though. That's just rude.
RayvenWhite 12
LOL I laughed waaaaay too hard at this but bruh, everyone farts.
vargaso 17
"A vicious fart"
Rusty00 9
you could say the stink is on you
Danielvera212 4
Probably the funniest thing I've ever read. xD
Stephencharis 14
break up??... that's the only thing you guys do in the west... smh
heroforhirex95 17
That's okay, it's a bonding experience!
chaine614 8
and op you have a very funny girlfriend