Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was giving my boyfriend head. As I was beginning to enjoy and really get into it, I heard him say, "Oh my god, this is good shit." I looked up sexily, only to find that he was eating a Twinkie. FML
Today, my boyfriend's idea of foreplay was to offer to make lunch, leave the room for a few minutes, then come back with no clothes on and offer me a "cockmeat sandwich". FML
Today, me and my boyfriend were fooling around on my bed when things started to get heated. I said to him, "Do what ever you want". He got up and said he'd be right back. I thought he went to get a condom. He came back with a sandwich. FML
Today, during sex, my boyfriend stopped and asked if he could eat a sandwich while we do it. FML
Today, I was giving my boyfriend a blow job. I thought it was going great and I was doing a good job, until he told me to "stop chomping on it like it's a hot dog." FML
Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, I told my boyfriend I was really horny. He then gave me the link to his favorite "porn". He said I should do it for him. It was a youtube video of some girl making a sandwich. FML
Today, my boyfriend was breaking up with me because he felt his needs were not met. I asked what I could do to change his mind. He said, "Suck my dick, right now." It got me more turned on than I thought possible. What is wrong with me? FML
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Top comments
sugarbabyxoxo 2
lmfao! Harold and Kumar quotes! ahahahah
deathartisan 0
hahaha. fyl op. but he is a funny guy. you should find a better quote to pull on him if you make him go down on you
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Comments (220)
Erindub 0
Yeah bitch you take it and when hes done you'll lick up his cum off the floor and thank him for it ; )
radmuffin 12
wow just wow
KaptainKupkake 1
That's... disgusting. What are you, a **** star? :D
fisheatsbear 6
I have never and never refer to my dick As a cockmeat sandwich...
fisheatsbear 6
never will*
px_fml 0
im a vegetarian :)
_Paul_88 0
I'm a vagitarian! :P
ambrz 0
nice one #88 haha
FoxhoundEP3 0
88 ftw
seeger33 0
Look, he wasn't serious, he was trying to be funny. Just tell him that he's no big bob. Maybe you should watch the same movies he does. Tell him it's time to pay the rent when he goes down on you.
RedBaron 0
you know you love them "cockmeat sammiches". all women do
ThatOneAdamKid24 0
hahahaha yessss Harold and kumar ftw! when he goes down on you tell him to munch that tuna carpet. I'm really not funny.
Ashle1gh 14
It was a decent attempt, haha.
gay_teen_1993 0
ur cute
bluebolt777 0
siiick
justmel_fml 0
yeah, totally^
thump_fml 0
I like dirty talk but it has to make sense. Sandwich?
PsychoMerk 0
take a big bite and tear it up >:)
papichulo1411 0
can you tear me up?
cooliodefined 0
take a big one