Today, I'm hiding in my own house, because my crazy neighbor wants to "play." Yesterday when I agreed, she made me spend the whole day with her, then burst into tears when I had to leave. She's been waiting outside for over two hours. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I'm hiding from my creepy next-door neighbor. She constantly trash-talks my partner of two years, she's mentally unstable, looks to me for support, has a raging crush on me, and she drunkenly tried to make out with me last weekend. I'm two months older than her daughter. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
Today, I quit my job after two years. Now I have my crazy boss sitting out in front of my house, telling me she wants to work things out. She's been there all day. FML
Today, I moved into my new apartment. My neighbor is apparently crazy and thinks I'm trying to 'steal' her husband. She watches me and is super paranoid. I have a two year lease. FML
Today, my crazy mother-in-law threatened to camp out outside my house so she will "never get left out" of our lives, all because we called instead of sending a written invitation to my three-year-old's birthday party. I actually believe she's crazy enough to do it. FML
Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML
Today, the crazy son of a bitch who lives next door to me once again got into a loud, rather one-sided argument with his cat. Twenty minutes later, he knocked on my door, asking if he could stay at my place for a couple of days. The look he gave me when I said no has me fearing for my life. FML
Today, I heard screaming coming from my neighbor's house. Since her husband has a history of abusing her, I called the cops. After they left with him in custody, she called to yell at me because they were "working things out" after "having a few drinks". FML
Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML
Today, I decided to sit on the back porch for a while to enjoy the nice weather and relax. Unfortunately, one of my neighbors was outside too, having a very loud argument with his wife for about 45 minutes. FML
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Top comments
BeastNerd 3
Ooh. Sounds hot.
KKMH 3
go out there and keep yo pimp hand strong!!!
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Comments (95)
BeastNerd 3
Ooh. Sounds hot.
Carbonation 0
I'm very interested in 'play'. Age could play a very big factor in this one...
JRBradley 9
Yeah hot.. Well right up until the crying part lol.. Then hot no more!
rexgar2000 10
maybe she's just deppressed? just **** her senseless like she wants everyday, what's wrong with that? Then if she cries when you leave just say I'll see you tomorrow.
rawrkittyrawr 6
Take lessons from the guy never being noticed in english class.
pretty_coin 11
Yep, I wanna learn his powers of invisibility
aruam365 24
It's really best not to get involved emotionally or sexually with people who are clingy to an extreme like that. Often times they have some sort of mental disturbance that can endanger other people and themselves if they become irrationally upset. Which happens often with some people like that. What's best is for her to be treated for her illness with therapy and medication if needed.
alphabetsoup96 0
Call the police if she is bothering u that much
nalia18 8
When you see a PYT hanging out at your tree to the creep AHH do the creep OHH - and dont forget to smile >:)
marmlr339 14
OP - is this in redcliffe?
BjgUsername 12
How old r u guys? I feel like I'm now on the list
PopRocks14 0
Run, OP. Run away, and never come back. EVER.
CoconutSoup 5
Freaky
gamefreakpog 5
creeper...
Michael_Kelso 0
Creepers gonna creep.
flamegrilled123 3
That's a nice house you have there
EmilyJoSmyth 4
Shame if something were to happen to it.
cfalen 0
Sssssssssss -boom-
shadowsun28 0
Hah love the minecraft reference.
kennethongcs 0
It's a yogscast reference
cBlackout 13
How is it just a yogscast reference?
Michael_Kelso 0
Because Simon always says that. The game doesn't say it.
arcticdoctorwho 0
Crazy neighbors.. we all have them.
ZealIFeel 7
Too bad they don't all want to "play" though. I can think of more than a few occasions where that would be perfectly acceptable.
MyChemical_fml 0
OP is squidward :O
pretty_coin 11
but squidwards neighbours are awesome, hes the crazy one
wunderwaffe 0
gotta a bb gun?
LacyWings 3
My neighbor tried to set his house on fire. 3 times..
minecraft_fml 4
Shotgun!
KKMH 3
go out there and keep yo pimp hand strong!!!
thaCODgod 4
well said
Kiki242 19
What if she cuts his pimp hand off?? What is he to do then?
rroxie124 5
Yess.
FMLaddict2010 7
I couldn't of said it better myself XD
kimuraplata 0
And suddenly you wake up in a beat up bathroom, hearing; 'i want to plat a game'..
iNomBaconz 0
*Play
360XBOXFTW 0
I love platting games!
robertlovespi 3
30 you typo nazi
Free_Candy 0
42, speaking the truth.
ieatunicorn4fun 7
Lol I luv saw
lulututu 4
It sounds like a little kid to me. Just tell her parents.
Daralea 21
Or a crazy old lady.
ryukk_fml 3
play hide and see and ask her to hide.
RawEndo 1
lmao what if she gets angry afterwards. she might wanna play cops and robbers and keep him in "jail" forever in cuffs lol
Rdvlvt 0
That's what I was thinking too!
FMLaddict2010 7
40- Your a freaking genius!! That made my life
HomeAl0ne 20
Got to be better than "Doctors and Nurses".
hnz 13
There is sure to have a back door or secret door for you to escape! This is where the wardrobe from Narnia comes in handy
nikkkkkiii 7
Throw her in the wardrobe and lock it.
jo0owe 9
yeah right and ruin narnia, **** off i like snow too much, andd skiing with a lion! wow!
ellybelly_502 4
I hate when that happens!
P374RD3D 9
When does that happen?
pretty_coin 11
A lot!
TheFlyingMan 8
Hey, you're OP!
rttr 18
What happened now? Follow up post please.
kimuraplata 0
*play
white16sox 19
11 comment reply fail.