Today, my dad uploaded his porn collection onto our family server. My mom was convinced I did it and sat me down for a long talk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML
Today, my drunk dad went off on a tangent about his porn watching habits to the whole family. FML
Today, my mom had a talk with me while my dad was out. She said to stop using her lotion for my masturbation sessions. I asked her how long did she know. She replied with, "Ever since we put up that camera in the living room for burglars, where you happen to watch your porn." FML
Today, I celebrated my birthday. My mom invited a bunch of my relatives over, and they started telling funny stories of when I was a kid. My mom decided that then was an appropriate time to talk about how she caught me looking at porn the other night. FML
Today, my dad awkwardly asked me how to selectively clear his browser history. Apparently, my mom discovered his browsing habits and tore him a new one for looking at "nothing but vile smut". FML
Today, I was watching porn and found my mom on a webcam. When I told her that I saw her, she just took away my computer and told me to get off porn. FML
Today, I found some porn videos in my parents room. I put them in and began to toss off, but as the camera moved up I realized it was my mom and my step-dad. FML
Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML
Today, I found out my mom has been randomly searching my room. I've asked her repeatedly to stop, but she says it's her right as a parent. In retaliation I started searching their room when they were out, and found porn mags and DVDs. I confronted mom about it. Long story short, dad's in a hotel. What have I done?! FML
Today, while helping my dad look for his watch, I found his porn collection. FML
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Top comments
Exodiafinder687 58
"Come on mom! It's obviously dad's collection. My collection wouldn't fit on one server."
StickyPickles 33
I hope he had decent material at least and nothing weird. . Son, why are there 143 videos of pregnant Asian women and German Shepard **** on here? Or something equally disgusting
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Comments (45)
Typicall 21
Someone is in denial.
WhoopteDo 26
She's jealous that he'd rather watch it then spend time with her.
tossaway2321 5
Than
alex1022 11
that statement actually works with either than or then...
riffehunter 16
@6 I think the issue is her lack of participation.
StickyPickles 33
I hope he had decent material at least and nothing weird. . Son, why are there 143 videos of pregnant Asian women and German Shepard **** on here? Or something equally disgusting
xlord 27
That is an oddly specific example you gave there. Maybe we need to have a long talk about it........
riffehunter 16
that fetish concidered discusting? well then.... now I have to do something else with this external hard drive I just bought.
sabbyheartswhat 23
Someone is being a little judgmental...disgusting? Maybe a little outside the box, but not disgusting.
Exodiafinder687 58
"Come on mom! It's obviously dad's collection. My collection wouldn't fit on one server."
yeti37 16
Rename the file "Dad's Hentai ****" so that you don't confuse it with yours.
Jasim 17
Is it at least good?
Freda92 12
Yeah, something worth being accused of ;)
Jasim 17
Well I'm glad. Now we know your dad has a fine taste.
Freda92 12
I'm not the author...I was only kind of finishing what you'd started saying.
HeWillBeLoved105 22
I think you should sit your dad down for a long talk.
cakefete2 31
Yes, to compare notes.
Tannasgh 22
I would delete "your" **** from the server to make her happy.
timb1234 13
Lest your not in it
feven 32
Why would he upload it into the family server anyways? Sounds smart.
AscendV 19
If I was his wife Id be pissed that he had a whole collection lol
doctorhook86 25
#12: I fear that the Internet Age will not be kind to you.