Today, as I was walking my dog, two cute girls from my school were walking towards me on the sidewalk. I thought it would be appropriate to wave and give a smile. My dog thought it would be appropriate to viciously bark at and mount one of the girls. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML
Today, I was walking my new dog and saw this girl that I've had a crush on for months. When I approached her, I tried to look 'macho' with my dog. However my dog thought it would be more attractive to pee on my leg. FML
Today, I approached a cute girl at a club, and she started barking at me like a rabid dog. Thinking she might be mentally unhinged, I left, only to see the same girl laughing her ass off with her friends minutes later. When I went back over, her friends started barking at me too. FML
Today, a cute stranger waved at me on the street. I waved back enthusiastically, smiling like an idiot. Then I realized she was waving at her dog behind me. I then turned around and waved at the dog, then scurried home to bury my embarrassment in a pillow on my couch. FML
Today, I was out running. All of a sudden I saw a dog come towards me, I thought it was going to attack me and I screamed like a girl in front of everyone. It was a puppy wanting to play. FML
Today, I was walking into my school and I saw two girls kissing. Being a lesbian myself, and thinking it would be cute, I winked at them. I guess one of them had a history of cheating with a girl who looked just like me, because her girlfriend came up and punched me in the face. FML
Today, while walking my dog at the park, I spotted my crush and said "Hi!" By not paying attention where I was going, I tripped and fell down. My dog started humping me. FML
Today, I took my dog for a walk. He became friendly with another dog, and I reached down to pet them both. Suddenly, an old woman ran up to me and whacked me with her cane repeatedly. Apparently, her previous dog had been kidnapped by a woman who looked a lot like me. FML
Today, I was walking my dog around my neighborhood, when I saw this really cute boy. My dog then saw a squirrel and dragged me through mud. FML
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
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Top comments
ElricMustang 23
Damn; the dog beat you to it. FYL
beaglegun2009 4
Good doggy!!
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Comments (151)
GovernorGeneral 8
Step 1 : complete. Now just hope she likes dogs.
Birdie_Sage 0
She'll probably forgive the dog. Animals are too innocent!
texas_redneck88 10
What, he's just sayin' he knows a hottie when he sees one, that's all
ineslovescats 5
Aww that sucks OP maybe if the girls aren't bitchy they'll forgive your dog and not blame it on you? Besides there's always the other girl :)
returnpolicy 3
You dog you!
perdix 31
Maybe the dog was a retired drug-sniffer and one of the girls was smuggling crack under her dress.
emmacharbs 1
Ouch that's embarrassing, shake it off
PiXiq111 11
Lol you have the same taste in girls... like master, like dog!
GovernorGeneral 8
Dry.
perdix 31
Ask the other girl out and the four of you could double-date!
Birdie_Sage 0
The dog is a mind reader!