Today, was the first day of my new job. My boss admitted that they hadn't cleaned the employee bathroom for over two months. My first task: clean the employee bathroom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I started my new job as a janitor at a store. The first thing that happened when I came in was another employee telling me that there was vomit in the restroom, and that I had to clean it up. Not only did I clean up vomit, I had to clean up the poop that made the kid puke in the first place. FML
Today, my boss used the restroom at work. She returned and told me I needed to go clean the toilet because "someone left a mess in there." It was her mess. FML
Today, I started my job as a high school janitor. A student decided to welcome me by taking a dump in the urinal. FML
Today, it was my first day at my new job. Not only does everyone hate me for replacing a guy they all liked, I managed to clog the only functional toilet there. The glares and threatening head-shaking they keep doing probably means I'm screwed. FML
Today, I started my first day at work. When I used the bathroom, I thought I was peeing into the bowl but it was actually leaking out. My pants kindly cleaned up the mess. FML
Today, I walked into my new office for the first time after receiving the promotion I've been trying for. Someone took a dump on my desk. FML
Today, marks three weeks since I started my new dream job. It also marks the second time this week alone that I've clogged the toilet in the restroom. I'm almost 100% sure all my coworkers know it was me. FML
Today, while I was working a customer notified me that the men's restroom need some attention. Thinking that there was just a small mess, I walked into the restroom only to discover someone had taken a crap in the sink. Guess who got to clean it. FML
Today, I happily went to an interview after job searching for months. I learned a large part of my job would be cleaning the toilets. Every. Single. Hour. I used to lecture at a university until budget cuts happened. FML
Today, someone (we don't know who) put a very massive and noticeable graffiti "mural" in the bathroom at my workplace. Guess who's job it was to clean it? If you said me, you'd be wrong. However, the guy whose job it was got distracted and didn't do it, so it became my job after all. FML
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Top comments
baabyxniiica 6
Must have been a shitty job.
TheSnakeDoctor20 17
Atleast you got a new job in this economy.
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Comments (80)
baabyxniiica 6
Must have been a shitty job.
burninnapalm 5
What a shitty comment
TheCaterpiller 6
What a shitty reply
labudamike 6
What a shitty reply to a reply actually it was pretty funny
mooshymuffin 4
What a shitty looking caterpillar
Birdie_Sage 0
Shit happens.
kateRAWR 4
SHIT
kateRAWR 4
28 --- y r u wearing a nun costume if ur NOT a NUN
TheCaterpiller 6
23 - what a shitty looking face
_Oblivion_ 12
Rectal excrement
sqeakyclean 7
....
desireev 18
32- Maybe because she wants to.. Are you the Nun Police? Are you the super hero that busts all the fake Nuns? If you are not in that really cool scenario, then stop asking questions! Besides... Nun costumes are pretty cool.. Who doesn't wanna wear a Nun costume? Lol
_Oblivion_ 12
Who said it was a costume?
shanemaximo 7
I think 28 is wearing the traditional Muslim hijab head scarf. Not a nun costume.
periwinkle95 10
32, you are so ignorant. She's not wearing a nun costume. It's not even a costume at all. It's called a hijab, or a scarf. If you dont even know what that is, go google it and learn something new.
HighGTurn 12
She's Muslim dumbshit
Scarlettx7 0
How ignorant of you guys to think that's a costume
kalgon 0
Costume: 4. a set of garments, especially women's garments, selected for wear at a single time; outfit; ensemble. IT IS A COSTUME!!!
THE_A_TEEN 28
Don't care, #70. Quit spamming and jump off a bridge.
THE_A_TEEN 28
Don't care, #70. Quit spamming and jump off a bridge.
Jezlovespink 5
That happened to me b4 except it had been 5 months since someone had cleaned tge bathroom bcuz only guys worked there....
TheSnakeDoctor20 17
Atleast you got a new job in this economy.
Krirn 21
Shitty job opportunities and cars giving away free peanuts, things are looking up.
Birdie_Sage 0
And people forgetting to clean their private areas, things are starting to really look up from way down here!
rattusrattus 19
"Work hard in school and you wont have to get a job pulling crap out of the hairdresser's blocked toilet." Then they wonder why those who worked hard in school wont accept jobs pulling crap out of a hairdresser's blocked toilet. Yes, I did know someone whose main duty at the hairdresser's was to pull the crap out of the toilet after a weekly client shat in it.
loopsy_fml 14
Let me guess........ Op is a janitor
Guren 0
You know I found out if Americans made the iPads that Apple sells it would cost close to $14,000 because of our minimum wage law. And because companies are greedy bastards they pass the paying of the labor into the cost of the product.
xxooiloveyou 0
I stalked you. Sigh.
beaglegun2009 4
Looks like the boss sure loved you!!
Big_Chives 7
Just imagine what the future holds!
Grifballa 1
Looks like someone went on a down voting spree...
Nikkitaria 9
Congratulations! You have been promoted to "Boss' bitch".
coldashell 23
Cry me a river. There are people who have to clean peoples shit all day, every day, for a living.
SilverInGray 25
Yes, but FML is for complaining. You don't like it, you should probably stop reading it.
queen_awks 16
And if they're getting her to clean toilets then she may be one of those people....
Birdie_Sage 0
It's not like the OP is gonna clean poop and pee as his job, just make it squeaky clean and then you're done!
coldashell 23
10, Not sure you quite understand what FML is. OP had to clean the bathroom once. A true FML would be something along the lines of that is OP's full time job. Do you post an FML every time you are asked to clean a shitter?
SilverInGray 25
FML is about complaining in an entertaining way. I'd say cleaning a disgusting bathroom the first day at a new job, is pretty bad.
gantzlord 5
47- Since op is complaining about having to clean the loo I doubt it's what they signed up for and that's why it's an FML
ICATiger 13
Work hard enough and he'll be cleaning your shit of toilets!
ICATiger 13
*Off. Missed a damn F.
Birdie_Sage 0
Wow, most of the comments have been voted down. Haters!!!
French_Toast_fml 3
Do a really good job on the bathroom, and maybe you could get promoted to the esteemed position of janitor!
soupisyummy 13
That's pretty shitty of him
MsConfusedd 27
You're going to need a power shower.
ICATiger 13
Bear Grylls dream job. "Time to drink this piss. Might wash it down with the liquid in this shit. In some countries this is considered a delicacy.'
foreverboredZ 4
lol