Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to my little sister strangling me. My parents accused me of making the red marks on my throat myself to exaggerate how bad it was. She's just "going through a phase", they say, and I'm a bad person for punching her to get her off me. FML
Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Today, my mom called to chew me out for having my sister arrested. My sister broke into my apartment, rearranged my living room, and claimed she now lived with me. She then threatened me with a butcher's knife for not appreciating what she had done. My mom wants me to pay the bail. FML
Today, my uncle picked up a tissue box and threw it at my sister for fun. My sister got mad and yeeted the box at me. I reacted with the same action, but she lost her crap and kicked and punched me. When I reported the incident to my parents, I get berated and my sister got away with it. FML
Today, my sister was taking forever in the bathroom, and I jokingly threatened to kick down the door. I rammed into it, and it actually bust almost off its hinges. My sister screamed and our parents came running. Now I'm grounded forever and our bathroom has no door. FML
Today, I decided to scare my 10 year old sister for fun. I hid behind a door and leapt out, shouting "Boo!" when she walked by. She burst into tears and ran screaming to my mom. My mom thought I'd hit my sister, and was so angry that she punched me in the eye. FML
Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML
Today, my sister smashed a cup on my head because I told her she couldn't borrow one of my necklaces since she lost one and stole another. I was grounded for "antagonizing" her into doing it. FML
Today, my sister just had a huge fight with my mom. After that, she thought it was appropriate to smash my $1,000 guitar to "blow off some steam." FML
Today, my demented little sister walked up to me and kicked me between the legs. I told my parents, but they just accusingly asked me what I did to provoke her. When I said, "Nothing", they accused me of lying. There is no justice. FML
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Top comments
subwaysurfers 13
If it's so normal, start doing that to you your mom. She'll see how 'normal' it is.
Pleonasm 36
Make an amateur horror movie out of it and become rich.
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Comments (133)
starsentinel 3
This is what happens when you let your little sister play Mario...
wildcat90 1
Chase your mom with a mallet and then ask her if its normal
Kitten_Calderon 14
Find something really bizarre to do to your mum. Chase her with another object that cartoons use to beat people.. A pan, rolling pin,sword, towel, hey... Even a gun! On a side note cartoon antics should not really be attempted so.. Use the obvious less dangerous objects and blame it on Tom and Jerry making it look normal.
glittercookies 12
Spank her yourself.
ghashlycrumbs 8
Rhoda Penmark?
beatlegirl27 20
I think you should explain your sister that the mallet is for adults and she's not allowed to touch it. Keep explaining this to her until she understands. If that doesn't work, seek professional help.
TheyCallMeDamien 18
MALACHI MALACHI!
SammiixSue 13
My little sister used to chase me with a plastic ax...
dee_baybee 7
geez , I'd hate to be you & if I were your mother I'd have her committed.
lashes_to_ashes 14
Sounds like a child character from a horror movie.