Today, my little brother came into my room and hit me over the head with his baseball bat. He then dropped the bat onto my floor and ran crying into my mother's room proclaiming I stole his bat and beat him with it for fun. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML
Today, I was at the mall with my little brother. I saw him touching some expensive objects, so I slapped his arm. I noticed he wasn't my brother when he started crying and his real mom slapped me in the face. FML
Today, I had to take my little brother to the pool. He acted like a brat the whole time, and when I told him we were leaving, he ran away, slipped, and hit his face on the tile floor. He told my dad and step-mom I punched him. They believed him, and I'm grounded for two months. FML
Today, our mom hit my brother's head hard against the wall. He was taken to the hospital with a head wound. He came home in the evening, and said that his mom told him to say that it was his sister who'd hit him with a ball. My brother had told me the story and I'd recorded it on a tape recorder. FML
Today, my little sister chased me around the house with a mallet, giggling like a maniac. I ended up having to pin her to the ground, rip the mallet out of her hand and lock her in the bathroom. This isn't the first time. My mom still insists it's perfectly normal. FML
Today, I'm sitting in the ER with a broken finger, all because I beat my little brother in a Wii game. He ran over and twisted my finger, saying, "Now how are you going to beat me, cunt?" FML
Today, I went to drop my little brother off at the nursery. As I walked in, a boy punched me in the dick and ran away. FML
Today, my older brother puked in the sound hole of my sister's guitar. He blamed it on me, and in revenge my sister beat me with the guitar. FML
Today, my brother threw a mug at my head and threatened to stab anybody who came at him because I woke him up for school. I called the police after threats were thrown at my mom, who then lied to them and said I overreacted. I'm currently getting the silent treatment from my family. FML
Today, I got punched in the face after I beat my stepbrother at Mario Kart. I didn't really get hurt, but he managed to break a finger. My stepmom blamed the whole thing on me, accusing me of being violent and a bad influence on her son. FML
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Top comments
Ali_Br_fml 33
don't you just hate little brothers???
daBeast155 0
you've got the bruise to prove it
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Comments (176)
Ali_Br_fml 33
don't you just hate little brothers???
ahh_forever 0
Whatta cutie pie! :D
dolphincheddar 10
that kid is smart, is his name stewie
xlord 27
Lol I bet you people are still going to vote OP deserves it for some weird reason
Takuya272727 16
If he is going to say it, you may as well do it to him(without injuring him severely), so he doesn't lie about it. This will teach him two things. Not to hit you, and not to lie. Sometimes it can be the only lesson you can do to / for a brother. My brother was like that, and we adapted because of that.
TheChampagneBoi 5
Trash his xbox my friend did it and was never bothered again
Sacurason 0
19- That doesn't necessarily work. Many mothers would punish the older brother even without physical evidence of any kind of hit, and of course would punish even worse if there actually was a mark. Many parents take one child's word completely over the other. I have several friends who have been in the same situation; thank God my brother can't get away with it( he's tried ).
ThEKID96 4
You should put one of his toys on the floor or something and watch him trip as revenge.
Spade606 6
5- Wtf are you thinking?
ripgeorgecarl1n 7
If you are getting punished for something you didn't do, then there wouldn't be any harm in doing it anyways.
prince122 0
wow if my little brother ever did that to me or my older brother not only would we break the bat on him my mom would ground him just caus were older.
Goodatbeingbad 9
You should have given him something to actually cry about.
sirhobothesecond 3
im 16, and have a 9 year old brother. once, I accidentally elbowed him in the chest and he cried for about 3 minutes straight. when I told him to shut up and get over it, he punched me in the nose and broke my glasses. he then ran off to my mother saying that in a fit of rage, I elbowed him in the chest and told him to shit off. gotta love little brothers.
CabooseWins 0
OP, I hope your mother believed you. That is ****** badly, and I hope he is several punished. Not only for lying, but for attacking you for a bad reason.
Thatcow 5
What exactly does 'shit off' mean?
Boredumm 6
if your parents take your little brothers words over yours i think the best way for pay back would be to take videos or pictures of his embarassing moments and show'em to his friends or his future gf or something.
ahh_forever 0
To everyone who hit "thumb-down" on my first comment: Ever heard of sarcasm??
macbutt 0
my brother always gets away with it using even try anymore
thingfish 0
Steal his bat and beat him with it. if you're going to get in trouble you might as well deserve it.
Enderman1323 8
This is the internet, so no
PhantomRegiment7 9
dude yogur little bro blows. Second! xD
flockz 20
were u trying to spell yogurt in your mad attemt to get second, because as we all know, second is the first loser.
Jamialia 5
Obviously they are trying to spell your.
flockz 20
obviously i knew that. obviously u dont understand sarcasm. obviously u have no sense of humor. obviously your a troll. and yes obviously i think u need to shut the **** up.
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
nice pic phantom lol
Drclino 0
flocks = win
TheLetterZero 7
Who's flocks? I don't see that name here.
howslife123 0
FLOCKZ chill it's only a spelling mistake ..
flockz 20
obviously. :D
flockz 20
obviously. :D
flockz 20
nooo not a double comment i never thought this would happen to me.... FUUUUUUUUUU-
prince122 0
double comments are caused by double tapping send.
daBeast155 0
you've got the bruise to prove it
Laughing_Cow 0
What an asshole
biasedshooter 24
parents refuse to look at the evidence, and will just end up punishing the older one anyways. FYL op
Laughing_Cow 0
So true
howdmynosego 12
son of a bitch
shibainu519 0
I'm an oldest child too. I know this too well.
keven501 12
OP's a horrible older brother you got to make the little bros to sacred to do anything
SailorSolaris 43
Likely the blood too, #3.
zaveeshaveesh3 7
Glad I'm an only child.
IDontKnow10101 14
times like OPs makes me say "thank you for making me an only child God"
zaveeshaveesh3 7
I would love to have a little brother if I could fast forward for times like those
malachy32 1
u shouldn't be. only children get very spoilded
TaylorTotsYumm 10
45, it all depends on the parents. Don't stereotype.
swiftangel 1
Agreed with 66. I am an only child and growing up most of my clothes, etc. came from a thrift store. I didn't have cable tv, a phone, or any of the awesome things that my peers had growing up.
No_habla_espanol 11
It's ok swift, they aren't that great anyways. They're quite corrupting anyways.
TheBoss47_fml 3
I wish I was
emilycardona7 18
"spoilded"
Monkeyone 0
What a nice kid!
ArmedcrackerR6 8
That's a bitch move lol
rhpsfan9 10
ouch hope your mom believes you.
lolololer 8
she probably wont. my mom always listens to my lil brother cuz hes the "angel" :/
partyfool2011 4
Little bit of fake blood and faking unconsciousness ought to do it.
Swishmantastic87 0
You stuck out on this one bro but your brother hit a homer fyl
Philliesfan9391 3
You should actually beat him up with the bat for fun :D
malachy32 1
that's sick, u should go see a shrink, and/or a therapist.
hailphire130 0
You should take a joke.
VandalHeartX 0
seriously though, OP, if you get punished for this, you really should wail on the little bastard. if you get punished for it, you may as well commit the crime.
Philliesfan9391 3
Gosh! a lot of people who comment on my comments can't take a joke!
partyfool2011 4
The boy who cried wolf...
switchgurl20 17
Id do something to him while he is sleeping tonight